Edd: According to the footage here, you shook the vending machine and when the shake alarm went off, you punched the glass and broke it.
Tord: I was hungry.
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Tom (drunk): New year new me.
Edd: Bitch, it's August.
Tom: Time is an illusion.
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Matt: I have one braincell and it bounces around my head like a windows screensaver.
Matt: When it hits a corner perfect, I'm allowed one good idea.
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Tord: Uh.. Edd, do you love me?
Edd: Of course I do!
Tord: Would you still love me if I did something bad?
Edd: Of course I... would...
Tord: I mean something really, really-
Edd: Tord, what did you do?
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Matt: Is stabbing someone immoral?
Tord: Not if they consent to it.
Tom: Depends who you're stabbing.
Edd: YES?!!
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Tord: To everyone who has treated me poorly, I am sexier than you.
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Tom: The 'why the fuck's and the 'why are you so dumb's don't matter. All that matters is that I have a new harpoon gun.
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Edd: Matt, are you drinking... are you drinking hydrogen peroxide?!
Matt: It says 4202! That means it's the sequel to water!
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Edd: Tord! You need to react when people cry!
Tord: I did. I rolled my eyes.
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Tord: I’ve been described as a ‘heartless villain’ and a 'little shit’, but I prefer 'has alternative ways of having fun’.
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Edd: What do you call quantums of electromagnetic radiation that don’t get along?
Matt: What did you just say?
Edd: Foetons! :D
Matt: Wh-what??
YOU ARE READING
Eddsworld shitposting
Humorwhat is wrong w me... all my au :') (note: includes multi/shipping and headcanons)
