• A Blackbird's Serenade •

"Red Lily"

Tiana

I couldn't stop staring at her if I tried. In more ways than one, and for a number of reasons.

Every time she smiled at me or laughed, I felt another small repair at my heart, after months of it tearing. Every touch from her surged a fuzziness like no other through every part of my body, from head to toe. Hearing her voice again was almost surreal, I could forever listen to her talk for hours. The term 'missing her' simply didn't feel like the right words to measure up to this feeling.

And for all the books I've read, not even I could describe it.

Not to mention, especially after everything she's just told me, this woman never fails to leave me in awe. I don't think she understands, nor do I think I could ever conjure the right words to express, just how much I love and adore every little thing about her. Spending time apart again sounded like a personal hell nowadays.

After getting her settled in and making her some toasted chicken wraps, the two of us had found our way on the sofa as I had her tell me more about the tour.

With her back to my front, I lazily ran my fingers through the ends of her hair as her head rested back against my chest, the view of the sunset beyond the window kissing both our skin. Her hands had played with my other one while she spoke, letting our fingers dance around one another's in the air, blocking the sunlight with every other movement.

Some things she was a bit hesitant to open up to me about, but did so anyway once I continued to assure her that it was okay. It hurt me in some ways to hear it of course, but I neither moved or interrupted her.

I wanted to hear it, even if it made me feel awful, for I was doing my best to own up to my mistake and face the consequences of where it'd left things between us. I wanted to receive all of it, to let myself know to never do that shit again. To never hurt her again...

And not only that, but I truly wanted to know of how she'd been doing and how the rest of the tour went. I wanted it to be to where I still knew of everything that'd happened even if I wasn't there, to where it wouldn't seem like those three months were uncovered territory between us.

She told me of her troubles with alcohol, and how she'd hit her lowest and felt an extreme lack of purpose. I wasn't sure if I was breathing for that part but my eyes didn't leave her for a second as she spoke in a hush, purposefully not glancing back at me. And then she carried on to other parts, like how hard most nights were because she spent them all alone, and how pissed at me she was for leaving knowing that she needs me to do her hair after shows. At that part I couldn't help but laugh, with a humorous yet emotional kiss to her shoulder in silent apology.

Next, Journee told me about how she fired Angela, which left me somewhere between surprised and not so surprised at all.

Apparently she sensed a weird energy about her after I'd left, and she realized the woman was happy about the distance between us, for she sensed we were something more. 'That's when I realized she'd been a sneaky bitch that whole time,' Journee had said, making me laugh yet again.

And now, we were talking about how she feels after everything. After the tour's over and it's been three months of us being apart.

"I don't know I'm just happy to be back home..." she spoke with a sigh, tracing patterns on my thigh and holding my hand with her other one. "I don't think it's hit me yet, that I just finished my first tour... I'm not sure it's even hit me that I've gone on tour at all," she chuckled, having me slowly smile.

"You think you ready for whatever's next?" I asked with a mild kiss to her head from behind. "Have you thought of your next step already?"

"A little... I have two weeks off until I'm to return back to the studio for a meetin with Ms. Chase at the label. I have the snippets of a few songs for another record, but I don't even wanna think about all of that right now. I just wanna sleep for some days-"