With Love

Chapter 25: memories and resentment

Aliya looked exceptionally beautiful today. Her hair was curled at the ends, half tied back. Soft pink eye shadow and blush coloured her eyes and cheeks, while coffee-hued lipstick shaded her thin lips. She looked happy. In love.

Noor and Israh danced along to Mahi Ve awaiting their turn to get their hennas done. Tamannah groaned and shifted, partly annoyed at their freedom to have fun while she was stuck being the one in charge of mehndi. But she was also glad she could get involved like this in Aliya's wedding, leaving her own creative mark in her best friend's life.

The four knew it was only a matter of days before Aliya flew a million miles away from them, and their little group would become a trio instead. Of course, they'd still talk but meeting would be even more rare than it already was. It just wasn't the same. They wouldn't be able to reach Aliya whenever they wanted to and vice versa.

Aliya was Israh's first friend in the UK. When Israh moved to the country, she knew nobody and barely spoke any English. Her first month in high school was lonely and confusing. She'd skip her lunch every day, would sit by herself on a bench and watch as friend duos and groups moved along with laughter and play.

Back in Portugal, Israh barely had proper friends. Those girls were her friends one day, and enemies the next. They claimed to love her, and the next moment they'd bully her enough to get her crying on the way home. It was all so toxic there, and Israh was the only foreigner in that school too. She tried so hard to fit in, but nothing worked. Nobody liked her. Nobody wanted to be with her unless she helped them cheat in tests, or lent them her homework to copy.

She thought her people-pleasing habits must have formed from there. While her family was the strongest and most loveable while they lived in Portugal, her friends— with whom she had to spend significant hours of the day— were not so strong or loveable. The colour of her skin was different, her language was different, her culture, her religion, her family dynamics...everything was in odds with everything they were.

And once she came to England, that first month at school was so incredibly miserable, that she wanted to drop out every day. She hated the teachers' pity when they called her to the teachers' lounge to have lunch, or sat down next to her on the bench with stupid small talk. She didn't want them outside of the classroom.

Israh wanted friends. She was desperate for them. It'd be the only thing that could make her feel like she belonged there. Here.

And then one day, out of nowhere came Aliya. They were in the same maths class but rarely talked, and Israh didn't even think Aliya ever noticed her. The one thing Israh knew was that Aliya was as much an introvert as she was if her body language was any clue.

So, when Aliya came to that silly lunch club near the cafeteria, where Israh had found a refuge from curious and mocking eyes, Israh could do nothing but look her way askew. Aliya didn't even greet her, introduce herself or anything of the sorts. She just tapped her shoulder and said, "hey, let's go."

Israh didn't respond. She hurried to get up and follow Aliya out of that club and into the grass field where they sat and shared their lunches together.

It'd now been eleven years since they'd been friends. They'd always been within reaching distance. Israh didn't even know how she'd live without her.

But nobody talked about how different life would be once Aliya was gone. They'd silently agreed to keep quiet on the topic and just enjoy each other's company until the time to say goodbye came.

Israh's hands trembled just thinking about that goodbye and how heart-wrenching it'd be.

Aliya's phone screen lit up, with Rehan bhai's name flashing on it. Noor, Tamannah and Israh all burst out into teasing oohs.