HEART OF GOLD | C.Bridgerton

nine - another mother

ODDETE NEVER thought about how hard it would be as a lady in society without a mother. More so, without her mother.

She knew, of course, that Lady Thorpe would give very knowledgeable and appropriate advice.

But Lady Thorpe was nothing like Elise De Loughry.

"I am so pleased you wanted to meet with me!"

Odette is not sure how exactly she found herself in the Bridgerton drawing room, but she does know that Violet Bridgerton is the closest she can get to a conversation with her mother.

"Thank you for having me, I apologize for the late notice."

"Nonsense, would you like a pastry?"

Odette can never turn down a pastry, so she gladly accepts while Violet updates her on Francesca's suitors and Daphne's last letter home.

It makes Odette smile, and she wonders if this was what Violet and Elise did all those times the De Loughry's came over. It's a comforting thought in an otherwise muddled mind.

"I do hope that Francesca's favor from Her Majesty did not disappoint you too much, I too thought you were the season's diamond at first."

"Of course not, I think the spotlight would get quite overwhelming. Francesca is handling it admirably, I fear I could not fare nearly as well."

"You're much too humble, Odette. You handle attention beautifully. I saw your debut."

Odette smiles, remembering the joy she felt in that moment, before the smile is quickly gone as reminders of her current circumstances return.

"Are you alright, dear? Is something bothering you?"

Violet is looking at her with the same warm, coaxing eyes she sees mamas giving their girls at every ball, and it drops all of Odette's defenses.

"I enjoyed my debut— in the small moment between the doors opening and meeting the queen, I felt as if I was completely in control. I could portray myself as the lady I wanted to be, and it was glorious. But that feeling is no longer. Lady Thorpe does not understand my desire for a love match, and Lady Whistledown has ruined my chances of ever escaping my past. Not to mention that it seems none of my friends wish for my presence."

Violet nods along the entire time the young girl speaks, and clutches her hand as she finishes.

"My dear girl, the best thing you can do with control is relinquish it. You said you wish to make a love match, yes?"

Odette nods, and Violet hums.

"I figured as much. Do you think there is any control in love?"

Violet stands up, pulling Odette with her from where their hands are linked. The pair approaches a picture of Edmund on the wall.

"Everyone told me that my Edmund was not the man for me. He had a past with the ladies, and all my knowledge of society told me I could not marry him. And yet, he gave me a love that I think very few people will ever experience. I tried to control it, much like you. I refused his advances in favor of a safer match, but I can tell you, it is so freeing to relinquish control. To let yourself feel, even when it is not a good feeling."

There are tears in both of their eyes, and Violet hugs the girl she's seen as a daughter for so many years.

"Love is the most uncontrollable thing, and yet it is the most rewarding. How can you fight for control when knowing that?"

Unbeknownst to the pair, a certain Bridgerton had entered the drawing room in time to catch his mothers words.

He had yet to speak to Odette, and something about the words from his mother's mouth directed at her made him feel extremely guilty.

Colin Bridgerton has spent the entire season trying to control the way he is perceived. He flirts when approached, he dances when expected, he has done everything right.

And yet, he does not feel happy. He does not feel the freeing satisfaction that he thought he would when met with the comfort of being exactly what the ton wanted him to be.

He could not listen to anything else after that, hastily exiting the room and heading for his own, where he wished to curl up with his notebook of travel writings.

Odette had not noticed the boys short appearance, but the matron Bridgerton knew better. She had every creak in the floor memorized. She knew exactly when her son entered, and exactly when he exited.

"And as for your friends, I think my children struggle with friends," she laughed. "Eloise is finding herself right now. I do not know what happened between her and Penelope, but it has forced her to make a place in society. The stress from that can make ladies do strange things. And as for my son, I think he too needs to relinquish some control. I will talk to him. He's never been able to stay upset with you for long."

Odette takes comfort in Violet's reassurances. When confronting her own feelings, she could understand Eloise's new friendship. It was impossible to cope with society's stresses without a friend— Eloise had picked Cressida, and Odette had chosen her best friends mother. Neither were really normal.

She also knows that the mother was not wrong in her statement. The longest Colin Bridgerton had ever managed to stay mad at Odette De Loughry was three days, back when he'd gotten the blame for ripping her dress while they were playing in the backyard.

Not to mention, Violet Bridgerton knew her children like the back of her hand— if she said it would be okay, it would be.

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lowkey don't like
this chapter and it's
midnight so no picture
up top, but I wanted to
update!