Mistakes Unveiled (LMM Sequel)

Our mistake, Our secret.

"It's basic stuff Ali, the basic jobs and all you have to do is assign them to people". He placed a bunch of files on the desk as I swung in his big boy chair back and forth. "Pick up job, hand-off job, some cash pick-up and we'll deal with the safe house set up since the delivery will be big this time". He informed me as he threw a bunch of other small files on the desk. "So all you have  to do is assign these to people who you're sure can actually do them, I don't need that bullshit job you guys did last time, might've got us in real trouble".

I wanted to stand up for us at that moment and disagree with him because though stupid as fuck Beet and Luke got the merch. Thats all that mattered in the end. But I shut the fuck because I wasn't in the mood to speak and stand up for myself or Beet after what happened last night. The guilt I had was enough to shut me up for the rest of my life. I didn't want to think about it or remember the slightest bit of last night's events. If possible I wouldn't be meeting up with those kids today, I didn't want to see her face. But Nik has other plans.

"Hey, I'm talking to you, pay attention will you Alison? this isn't a fucking game". Since I got here it's the first time Nik used that tone with me and eyed me with that look, did he know what happened last night? Did everyone know? I didn't want to have to explain my actions but I would if I had to.

I'd explain my actions to Nik, Austin, Drew, the world, Beet and most painfully her, I'd have to explain my actions to her, and what would I do? Blame the alcohol? that's a childish excuse. Blame Beet? she was drunk too and was following her drunk thoughts and heart. Blame myself?... I allowed everything to happen, even in my drunk state I have to have control, what was that embarrassing shit I did last night? 

Fuck.

_

I eye the files on the table my eyes fixated on them but my mind elsewhere as I try to calm my heart rate and mind. I release an exaggerated exhale as my sight zooms and blurs specifically on the word hand-off on one of the files. Hand-off, hand off, hand, off, off. 

"Hey, you good?", I blink a few times eyeing Luke as he swings a hand around my shoulder and squeezes me in an effort to give me a side-hug.

"Huh? yeah yeah" I nod unable to fake a smile. That is one of the things I've never been able to fake, thus the scowl when my face is neutral. 

"Good, cause I'm still hangover from last night honestly" he speaks in his usual quick excited tone as he looks around the room thats already half full with his fellow crack-heads. "Where's Beet?" he looks at me and my scowl hardens. Why would he expect me to know the answer to that?

"How am I supposed to know? aren't you her side-kick?" I raise a brow questioning him and now that I think of it, sounding suspicious. Luke being the dumbass he is though, chuckles raising his hands in defence making a point to take a few steps back.

"I was just asking you because you disappeared with her last night and I haven't seen her since that's all". 

I huff at his response and nod, I had to calm the fuck down... I know for a fact Beet wouldn't be acting like his because of last night. They'd be cool with it.

"Well I haven't seen her since then either, it's not like I slept over at hers" I shrug. I was lying though, I did, I slept at hers and in her bed. I turn away from him and look right ahead with fear that he'll see through me though he doesn't know me that well yet. But to say that was a mistake would be an understatement because almost immediately my eyes land on shiny colourful hair that no one has except her. Mistakes, we can- I can't stop making them, hell the whole of my existence is a mistake.

I eye the files on the table my eyes fixated on them but my mind elsewhere as I try to calm my heart rate and mind. I release an exaggerated exhale as my sight zooms and blurs specifically on the word hand-off on one of the files. Hand-off, hand off, hand, off, off.