Chapter 110

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This is why we can't have nice things by Taylor Swift

Here's a toast to my real friends, they don't care about the "he said, she said" And here's to my baby, he ain't readin' what they call me lately.




9th January 2022 — The day after Avery's one year ball:

"You got everything packed?" Grayson's voice echoes in my ears over the paranoid voices haunting my mind.

"P?" He repeats, trying to snap back my attention. "You okay Baby?" He mutters, tilting my chin with his thumb to look at him.

I feel my lip quiver and before I know it i'm bawling. "Don't cry." He soothes as he hugs me, stroking my hair up and down.

"I don't wanna leave you." I sob into his shoulder. "You're acting like we'll never see each other. I swear to you, every chance we get we'll see each other. We'll call every night." He promises me.

"You promise?" I look up to him with doe eyes and let out a cry when he frowns and sticks out his pinky. I interlock his with mine and press our foreheads together.

"I love you always, baby." He nods against me, kissing against my nose softly. "Always and forever." I agree, the tears on my cheeks dripping down to his shirt and wetting it.

And then he holds me. He holds me until I leave for the airport. He holds me with an arm over my shoulder all the way to the gates. And then he held me like he'd never see me again. And then he let me go.


24th November 2022 — Thanksgiving:

I sit alone in my roommate and I's lousy kitchen, microwaving a prepackaged turkey and mash potatoes meal. All alone on Thanksgiving. Frankly feeling thankful for nothing at this sour point in time.

I told Grayson not to call me when they were having dinner despite his protests, mostly because I didn't want to bum them all out, but mostly because I don't want to bum myself out.

All my roommates have gone home for the holiday. I'm stuck here teaching a bunch of sticky tweens how to cartwheel and pirouette. 

"To anyone who's listening, I'm thankful for money, dance, my tits and Grayson. And you know, my family or whatever. A-fucking-men." I grit as I aggressively rip my dry ass turkey up and swallow it with a groan.

My phone pings, I flip it over anticipating a text from Grayson. 

Unknown number: Don't worry Sweetheart.. I'm listening x

I actually snort at anyone texting the word 'Sweetheart' these days, that's until I retrace my previous words and feel my stomach drop in terror.

"What the fuck." I groan, feeling like i'm going to throw up.

I have a very memorable feeling i'm about to be murdered.

I rise to my feet and immediately start to call up Grayson. Maybe he's surprising me with a last minute trip home and he's pranking me? He picks up within four rings. He looks happy to hear from me, wearing his adorable suit.

"Say hi to Paris guys." He passes his phone around everyone — yes, everyone — at the table until I finally snap.

"Put Grayson on!" I yell. Everyone's smiles drop and the phone is quickly passes back to Grayson.

"You okay baby?" He says, now donning a new tone of worry.

"Where are you?" I ask firmly. "At home?..." He stares at me puzzled.

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