Would You Kindly Slay the Demon Lord? (Konosuba X Male Reader)

Episode 7

We see a field, the dark clouds filling the place with an eerie silence, as in the middle of it, we see Y/N, his shoulders slouched and a look of disbelief on his face.

We see the other adventurers fighting against the monsters in the emergency quest.

Flying cabbages.

Yes. You heard me correct.

Flying. Cabbages.

Y/N: WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FU-

-a few minutes earlier-

We see the adventurers ready to fight, as Aqua appears with a basket on her back.

Meanwhile, Y/N was utterly gobsmacked, bewildered, shooketh, flabbergasted, and shocked simultaneously.

Aqua: That's right. In this world, cabbages fly. When they reach optimal flavour and harvest season approaches, they don't just sit back and let themselves be eaten.

We see a bunch of cabbages plopping on the ground as they tackle the citizens and adventurers.

Aqua: It's said that they careen through cities and grasslands, cross the continents and oceans, and finally, silently pass away in a secluded region unknown to man, without being eaten.

Y/N: I see...

He jumps at a bunch of cabbages, as he desperately holds onto them.

Y/N: Take me with you! Please! I'm begging you guys! I'm willing to pay you guys double the amount for the ride!

The cabbages look at Y/N, weirded out by the boy's behaviour.

One of the adventurers sees Y/N being lifted in the air.

Adventurer: They're abducting our friends!

He runs at the cabbages and cuts them all up.

Y/N: Noooooooo!!!

He then gets up and looks around, but sees a bunch of cabbages heading right at him.

Y/N quickly jumps out of the way.

Luna: Everyone! The annual cabbage harvest festival has arrived! This year's cabbages are of high quality, so each head will be sold at 10,000 Eris each!

Y/N's ears perk up.

Y/N: 10,000 Eris for one of these things? Are they serious?

A bunch of cabbages once again charge at Y/N, but before he could do anything, Darkness gets in front of him, and takes the hit herself.

Darkness: Don't worry! I'll protect you!

Y/N: ... Eh?

Darkness continues to take the assault head on, shielding Y/N in the process.

Darkness: I'll prove my worth to you, and get you to have me join you and your party!

Y/N: ... Ehhhh?

The cabbages continue to crack her Armor, and it starts to soon fall off, but she stands tall and rigid.

Kazuma was watching all this, worried.

Kazuma: Darkness... You...

He notices what was happening, and so does Y/N.

Kazuma: ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ

Y/N: ... EHHHHHH??

What do you know? Darkness was enjoying getting hit and having her Armor be torn away by the cabbages, as everyone watched her with "lewd" eyes.

Y/N: THIS BITCH IS A FUCKING MASOCHIST!!!!

Meanwhile.

Megumin: Oh, blackness shrouded in the light... Frenzied blaze clad in the night... In the name of crimson demons, let the collapse of thine origin manifest!