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"I love you Annie, and I'm sorry for everything" his hands squeezing mine as he looks down at me, his blue eyes making my heart flutter.
My eyes shoot open to my dark bedroom, a light sweat coating my body as I realise it was all just a dream.
I let out a quiet, frustrated groan as I run my hands down my face.
Of course he's infiltrating my dreams now, the few hours of peace I have to escape from my shitty reality, and now he's ruined that too.
I lay restlessly for some time, soon coming to terms with the fact that there is no point in trying to go back to sleep while my head is spinning with thoughts.
I sluggishly roll out of bed, trying my hardest to stay quiet as I walk down the hallway and down the stairs, careful not to wake anyone.
I silently make my way to the kitchen, pouring myself a much needed glass of water before gulping it down so quick you'd think I haven't drank in days.
I wipe my lips, setting the empty glass down in the sink as I turn to head back to my room.
Just as I go to take a step, a figure emerging from the doorway startles me, resulting in me letting out a yelp as my hand flies to my mouth.
"Jesus Christ. What the hell are you doing down here?" Rafe hisses in a whisper from shock, seemingly as alarmed as I am.
I let out an unsteady breath, my heart rate slowing down from the sudden scare.
"Why are you creeping up on me like that! I almost had a heart attack" I whisper shout.
"I didn't know anyone was down here" his eyes rolling at me, his voice hoarse.
"Did you need something?" I ask him in a defensive tone, my eyes narrowing slightly.
"Water" he asserts bluntly.
"Oh" my expression drops as I move out of the way of the sink, letting him past.
I can't help but let my gaze flicker over to him, memories of my dream confusing me all that much more.
I quickly pull my eyes away before he notices, instead looking down at the ground as I contemplate on speaking.
"Can't sleep?" He asks, beating me to it.
I look up when I hear his voice, catching his gaze from across the kitchen.
"Not really" I give him a small shrug.
I stay quiet for a moment, almost as if I'm nervous to talk to him, even after all this time.
"What about you?" I croak out weakly, before clearing my throat a bit.
He looks at me with furrowed brows before letting out a quiet chuckle.
"How am I meant to sleep when I know you're here?"
My head snaps over to him in surprise, my eyes widening.
"I thought... I mean you...you hate me" I stammer out as he slowly approaches me, looking down at me with a shockingly soft expression.
"I could never hate you" he murmurs softly, extending a hand out to my face, brushing a piece of hair behind my ear.
My brows knit together in confusion as I shake my head, not believing him.
"Me and you, this, shouldn't happen. You know that Rafe"
He frowns a little, a hurt expression spreading over his face as his fingers trails down my cheek.
"Don't say that. We might've argued a lot, but I can be different this time" he sounds like he's almost pleading with me.
"I can change, I'll change for you" he continues in a plea, his hands moving to hold the counter behind me as he traps me between his arms.
I let a shaky sigh, looking up at him as I try to figure out what kind of game he's playing here. Having known Rafe for so long, I've learnt that he's always got some sort of ulterior motive.
It's hard to believe that anything he says is actually genuine.
He leans down, his breath hitting against my neck, my will power progressively slipping away.
"Come on Annie, don't do this do me" he practically begs in my ear, his teeth nipping at my earlobe gently.
He moves his head so he's looking down at me, his eyes flickering with a mixture of lust and admiration, a light tint of pink to his cheeks.
"I miss you, I miss you so much it hurts" his face lowering down to mine, close enough that our noses brush against each other's.
"I miss the way you taste, the way you moan, the way you feel when I'm inside you" he whispers, his warm breath hitting against my lips.
"Rafe-" I breathe out raggedly, before his lips meet mine, cutting my words short.
He groans against my lips almost immediately, like he's been craving me. I begin to kiss him back slowly, savouring every part of him that i possibly can.
My hands move to the nape of his neck, pulling him in closer until his body is pushing mine into the kitchen counter behind me.
His kiss is gentle, yet still passionate at the same time, as his hands move to my waist, keeping a firm hold of me as if he's scared I'll leave him.
His lips move from mine as he trails them along my jaw and down my neck.
"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry" he mutters against my skin between each wet kiss.
I tilt my head to the side to allow him more access, ignoring the screaming voice in my head telling me to ignore his apologies.
"I love you. I love you more than I can even begin to describe Annie" he continues, his mouth trailing over my sensitive skin.
"I love you too Rafe" I whisper weakly despite knowing how big of a mistake this is, but I can't ignore the burning desire growing inside of me for him.
I feel his lips form into a smile against my neck as he squeezes my waist a little tighter.
He raises as his head to look me in the eye, a smile still evident on his lips.
"Please just give this another chance, I can change. I promise you"
If I agree to this, I'm going against everything I've tried so hard not to slip back into, I'll be betraying myself.
But...
The ache in my heart is almost enough to make me forget all about that. Just to know I'll be in his arms again, to know I'll be loved by him once more.
Quick note, I will be finishing this story off at chapter fifty! So five chapters left unfortunately. It's definitely had a long run and I'm very grateful for everyone that's taken the time to read, especially this far!