Hidden Longing's

48.Fear

Gayathri's pov:

I'm in a deep sleep, but the sun's rays gradually pull me out of it, along with two arms that are holding me close. As I open my eyes, I see Bava resting on my navel, sleeping like a child. That’s when I realize we don't have anything on our bodies—we're completely naked. The memories of last night rush back to me. When Bava asked, I couldn't resist him, and then everything that followed felt like a blur, something beyond words. After our time together, he apologized for the pain, but now he's lying on me so peacefully, like a small, innocent child.

I can't help but smile at the sight of him, but deep down, I can't shake the uncertainty. Was what we did the right thing? My mind is a whirlpool of thoughts, and before I know it, Bava slowly wakes up and looks at me. I manage a weak smile, but my body feels drained of energy. He leans in and kisses my temple, whispering an apology. I just smile and nod, but as I try to get up, the sharp pain in my lower abdomen makes me hiss. "Aaah," I gasp, sitting back down on the bed.

Bava swiftly gathers me in his arms, cooing softly to comfort me. He carries me into the bathroom, helping me brush my teeth and even bathe. I appreciate his care, but the feelings of uncertainty continue to gnaw at me. Breakfast is a quiet affair; Bava seems to think I'm in pain, but the real struggle is happening in my mind. I don’t know why, but when Bava suggests I skip college for the day, I insist on going. Maybe I need time to sort through my thoughts, to figure out if what happened was a mistake.

At last, he drops me off at college, telling me to take care and to call him if I need anything. I nod, watching him leave, but my mind is still not at peace. As I join Aaru, Preeti, and Tarun, their teasing and banter should lighten the mood,

As soon as I walked up to Aaru, Preeti, and Tarun, they were already in the middle of some banter. Tarun noticed me first and grinned widely.

Tarun: "Well, well, look who finally decided to grace us with her presence! Gayathri Akka, did you get lost on your way here or were you just too busy daydreaming about Bava?"

Aaru: (giggling) "Or maybe she was trying to think of the perfect way to tell us about her ‘special’ morning!"

Preeti: "Hmm, I bet something interesting happened. Come on, spill it, Gayu! Why are you looking so dazed?"

I rolled my eyes, trying to brush them off, but Tarun wasn’t letting me off that easily.

Tarun: "You know, you have that look, Gayathri. The 'I-have-a-secret-and-I-don't-want-to-tell-anyone' look. You're not fooling us."

Aaru: "Exactly! Out with it. Did Bava do something romantic? Or were you two busy, uh, 'studying' together last night?"

Preeti: "Ooh, I can already imagine it! Bava, with his smoldering eyes, cooking a candlelit dinner while you blush and try to act all cool."

Tarun: (laughing) "Or maybe it was a Bollywood-style confession with roses and background music playing. Did he finally confess his undying love for you?"

I tried to interject, but they weren’t giving me a chance.

Aaru: "Gayathri, you’re glowing today. That’s not just the sunlight, you know. It’s that ‘Bava Effect.’"

Preeti: "Seriously, what did he do? Write your name in the sky? Propose on one knee? Declare his love in a sonnet?"

Tarun: "Wait, wait! Let me guess. He sang a love song for you, right? Something like ‘Tum Hi Ho’ while you blushed and tried to hide your face."

Aaru: "Or maybe he just carried you off like some prince charming. You know, 'Bava to the rescue' kind of scene."

Preeti: "Gayathri, blink twice if it’s true!"

I couldn't help but laugh at their ridiculous ideas. They were so off, but the humor helped me forget my worries for a moment.

Me: "You three seriously need to stop watching so many movies! It’s nothing like that."

Tarun: "Aha! So there *is* something. Come on, spill it!"

Aaru: "Please, Gayathri! We’re your best friends. Don’t leave us hanging like this!"

Preeti: "Yeah, we need to live vicariously through your romantic adventures. Don’t be cruel!"

Tarun: "Exactly. I mean, the rest of us are stuck with boring textbooks and professors. Give us something exciting to talk about!"

Aaru: "Or at least confirm that Bava is as dreamy as we all think he is. Does he have that mysterious, brooding hero vibe or what?"

Me: (laughing) "You guys are impossible! It’s not what you think… but let’s just say, it was a very… memorable morning."

Tarun: (grinning) "Memorable, huh? That’s all we needed to hear. The details can come later!"

Preeti: "Don’t worry, Gayathri .We’ll let you keep your little secret—for now. But you owe us a full story soon!"

Aaru: "And we’ll be here, ready with popcorn when you do!"

I shook my head, but I couldn’t stop smiling. As annoying as their teasing was, it felt good to laugh with them, even if I wasn’t ready to share everything just yet.

I can’t fully engage. Despite the laughter around me, that nagging feeling lingers—did I do the right thing, or have I crossed a line that I can't go back from?

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