Shattered Secrets

Chapter 4: Stay

He look incredible, a simple black polo and jeans. His one hand shoved into his pocket the other hanging down by his side.
"Hey, can I come in?" he said so nonchalantly as if him standing here wasn't the most shocking thing that's happened to me in days.
"Yeah of course." I tried to match his tone turning my body so he could come inside. I was suddenly very very aware that I was in my pajamas.
"I didn't mean to just show up but you said before we left you wanted to talk" he looks down at his shoes, this is the second time I've seen him nervous like this. Until he said that I had completely forgotten about our fight before the case. My frustration from that day resurfaced slightly.
"What are we doing, Arron? Making out, stolen glances, sleeping in the same bed, you showing up to my apartment. I mean I thought you hated me before this past week." I sigh, now I'm the one who's nervous.
"August, I've never hated you." He took a step closer to me "I could never hate you, you can frustrate the shit out of me sometimes but I promise I don't hate you" He tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear, every time he does that I feel like my knees are going to give out beneath me. Now my lips are the ones attacking his. This time it's not slow and questioning it was desperate and intense. He tasted sweet like coffee and vanilla, he tasted like home. We stood there for what felt like eternity, I never wanted to stop. In that moment I realized I was falling for him. I was falling hard and fast and I couldn't stop it.
"August hold on-" he tried to pull away but I couldn't hear him over the racing of my own thoughts and heart. I didn't want him to tell me this was wrong, that we had to stop, that we couldn't do this anymore, I just wanted us to stay in our own bubble where we could be happy.
"Let's just talk okay, I came here so we could talk. We have all night as long as I can stay" his voice was soft barely above a whisper keeping his face close to mine. His hands tracked from my face down my shoulders to grab my hands. He pulled me over to the couch and sat down making sure I was close to him. We just stared at each other. I could tell he was trying to profile me but if I've learned anything from my time with the BAU it's that profiling a profiler is harder than you think.

"Why do you think I hate you?" he broke the silence, I could hear genuine curiosity in his voice.
"You were always harder on me than everyone else and if I made a mistake you came down on me way more than the rest of the team. The amount of times you could have written me up or reported me-"
"But I didn't, did I?" he made a good point, he was tough on me but he never reported me to Strauss and even vouched for me once. I never realized it but maybe I wasn't the only one falling for someone.
I let out a quiet laugh, "You're like a little boy with a crush, you show a girl you like her by pulling her pigtails."
He chuckled "I guess I am, some things never change even as we get older." My mind was spinning, racing full of questions I couldn't answer. How long has he felt this way? How long had I been this painfully oblivious for? How long could we last? All this job knows is how to take. It's taken more from me than I would ever care to admit. I don't want it to take him too, to take the one good thing it's given me.
"How long have you felt this between us?" I gesture between the two of us, at least he can answer one of my questions.
"You want the honest answer"
"No dumbass I want you to lie to me, that's why I asked." I can't help but tease him, I feel safe with him I can't remember the last man I felt safe with outside of platonically.
"Since the second you walked into my office with your transfer paperwork." He looks down at his hand fidgeting with his fingers. I reach down and grab them holding his hand in mine. I can't think of a single response other than kissing him. Locking our lips together feeling his hands unlink with mine and find their way into my hair and on my waist. I find myself craving the way he tastes, searching for more. I pull back, I need to tell him so many things he needs to know the millions of thoughts running through my brain.
"What's wrong?" He asks, worried that he had done something wrong.
"I don't want you to leave, I don't want tonight to end. Stay with me."
"I'll stay as long as you'll have me."
I curl up into his chest getting another wave of his cologne and taking a deep breath. For the first time since I joined the team I felt like I found my place. My place was in his arms.