Shattered Secrets

Chapter 5: The end...?

It had been a month since our drunken kiss and two weeks since the night I asked him to stay. For two weeks Arron and I have spent every moment we can together. There was never anything making us official but I didn't care. It was unspoken but I was his. Over these weeks we've talked about everything and anything. We've bonded over our horrible fathers and the religious homes we were raised in. I told him about ending up in boarding school in high school and how I met my best friend. He told me about Haleys affair and how betrayed he felt afterwards. I showed him parts of my soul that I had never shown anyone and he cherished and embraced everything. He was the first man I ever knew to not want me to change myself for him but care about me for who I was. I hadn't told anyone yet but it was pretty hard to keep it completely a secret considering we worked with a group of profilers. Arron and I decided to tell them on all on the upcoming Friday. Well I had decided but he agreed, I didn't want to keep it a secret from everyone anymore. We all planed to have dinner at Rossi's house so he could teach us to make some fancy pasta dish. Mostly dinners at Rossi's turn into drinking wine while he makes dinner and tells us we're doing it wrong. It's just like we're all one big family and I love our family dinners.

My daydreams are snapped short by a loud buzz of my phone resting on my desk. A text from Arron lights up my screen, my heart skips a beat. Even though I see him practically everyday I still get ecstatic when I hear from him. As quickly as my mood went up it fell and my heart landed in my shoes. "We need to talk. Can I come over at 7?" Nothing good ever comes out of we need to talk. I knew I had been living in a fairytale for to long. It was just a matter of time before I lost yet another important thing to me, things had been to good lately to stay like this. What was I thinking? That a man like him could be with someone like me. I wrote back a simple "K." I tried to keep myself in check but the rest of the day felt like my brain was on fire.

[Later that night]

The knock at my door comes exactly at seven, he's always so punctual I wondered if he had been standing outside just waiting for the time to pass. I opened the door and turned to let him in. He looked tired, the air between us felt different. I knew just by the way he came inside this was not our normal kind of night. He walks in staring at his shoes and I shut the door behind him. We don't get more than 10 steps into the room before I can't keep my thoughts to myself anymore.
"Why are you here Arron?" I didn't want to sound sad when I spoke but my voice betrayed me.
"I told you we need to talk, we can't keep doing this...I can't keep doing this." His typical confidence gone he sounded like a scared child.
"I don't understand, what changed? I thought this was good, I thought we were good? Talk to me let's figure this out together." I hated that I was being this way but the fear was setting in. Even though this is what I saw coming all day now that it was real I was terrified.
"Look August-" He started to speak but I couldn't let him finish I had to much to say.
"No, no don't do this, Arron please I know where this is going. Please don't do this" I hated that I was begging him, I hated that now I sounded like a child, and I hated that I could feel the tears filling my eyes.
"I'm still in love with Haley, I have a family August I can not keep acting like I don't." My blood ran cold and my heart fell to my shoes. He ripped it out of my chest and stomped on it. I couldn't look at him anymore. This was the man I poured my deepest secrets out to and now he's standing in front of me telling me he's in love with someone else.
"Get out. I can't look at you, get the fuck out of my apartment." My words tasted like vomit in my mouth or maybe I was actually going to be sick I couldn't tell.
"August-"
"I said GET THE FUCK OUT!" Now I was screaming and I didn't care. I wanted him out and I never wanted to see him ever again. I stormed over to the door and threw it open as he walked out I slammed it hard behind him. The door shook as I slid down it onto the floor no longer able to contain my sobs. I felt like I couldn't move that I would never be able to get up from this spot on the floor. I don't know how I was expected to go to work tomorrow. Let alone Rossi's on Friday. I thought I had found my home and he had set a match to it.