THE DRINKS HAD STARTED TO CATCH UP TO LEXA, the room spinning in one big lullaby as she rested her head on Dusty's shoulder. He nudged her lightly, trying not to startle her silence. He asked quietly, his eyes searching for hers, "You sure you're okay?"
When she didn't respond immediately, he sighed with a sense of regret but continued, "I don't get much air time with you anymore. I just want to know what's going on with you. I'm... I'm gonna back off, for real. Just tell me what you want."
Lexa groaned, shifting uncomfortably, "It's a lot. I don't even know what that looks like."
Dusty held back his groan, ignoring the sadness that plunged him when he traced his fingers over her hair. He chewed at the inside of his cheeks, a whisper falling out that she'd miss, "You know."
His voice steadied, the boy gulping afterward as he strategically spoke, "Spider... He uh, he's-"
And her voice livened, "He talks about women like they're nothing, like they're objects. Then he'll... He acts differently when it's me. I know why... but fuck, it's so hard to fight two sides of him. To think that I can't... I just fucking can't justify opening up to him the whole way. Not after everything. Not after it."
Lexa stared blankly at the floor for a moment as her words concluded, a looming silence falling over the two as she felt embarrassed she'd even opened her mouth.
Dusty nodded, his expression softening, "How does that make you feel?"
Lexa admitted, her voice trembling. "I don't know how to trust him with anything serious. When we were hooking up... I always felt this tether back to you. I had already opened up to you, and now... I don't know if I can put the trust in Spider."
"And I need it," The blurting stopped, Lexa pulling away from Dusty as she stared at him, "This isn't fair. I know that."
But he'd heard enough to fuel him, "You need it Lex... What for? Just tell me what's going on..."
Dusty's gaze lightened when she darted her eyes away, "It isn't just the front. Y-you're afraid he won't take you seriously?"
Lexa nodded slowly, though she kept mumbling, "I'm sure he would. I'm sure you would. But I just... I don't know. I don't know what could possibly satisfy me anymore. I need something from myself, something I can't just fucking grasp."
The door to Amerie's room swung open abruptly, and Harper stormed in, her face set with urgency. She coughed, "Sorry to interrupt, but I really need to talk to Dusty."
Lexa, still sitting on the floor, blinked up at her, disoriented, mumbling, "It's nothing. Really, you don't need to-"
She tried to get to her feet, but the room spun violently. Gripping the edge of the bed for support, she managed to pull herself upright, though her movements were unsteady. Dusty rose, concern etched on his face as he made a move to follow her, but Harper stepped in his path.
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𝖕𝖔𝖕𝖚𝖑𝖆𝖗 | heartbreak high
FanfictionCURRENT popular. 2022. oc x dusty/spider/malakai.