TWD- Through Her Eyes

4. Sad, Angry, Or Both?

I'm sittin' on the ground next to Lori as she stands up and hangs some clothes on a string. Amy and Andrea are here, too, doin' the same thing as Lori.

I've been so, so worried since last night. I could barely sleep because I was so worried. That, and I had to sleep on my own since my dad wasn't there. I hate to admit it, but I'm kinda afraid of the dark. But only if I'm by myself.

I'm drawin' pictures in the dry, sandy dirt with a thin twig I found. I kinda wish the dirt was more wet so that the picture would keep it's form. I'm tryin' to draw an elephant, but it just looks like a blob.

"Ma'am?" I ask Lori as she hangs a small shirt on the line. I think it's Carl's. She looks down at me briefly with a small smile, urging me to continue. "I'm worried my dad'll be super mad when he gets back," I say, lookin back down at the dirt.

"Well," I look back up again as Lori starts to talk, "I think he'd have every right to be. His brother's gone, sweetie," she says kindly.

"Yeah, but...when he's super angry he can be dangerous. One time, I was at the store with him, and I seen him punch two guys in the face because they were lookin' at me all weird," I say. I've actually seen my dad punch a lot of people, but I think if I told Lori that, she'd just dislike my dad even more.

"Well, he's your dad, sweetheart. That's what dads do. They protect," Lori says.

I guess there are different kinds of angry. When my dad is angry, he yells and hurts people- with his words and his fists. But when I'm angry, I just cry or stay quiet, because it ain't worth making other people angry, I don't think. Also because my dad hates it when I talk back.

"Seriously," Andrea chimes in, her voice softer than it usually is, "if any guy looked at me the wrong way, my dad would've laid him in a second," she said with a smirk, handing a pair of shorts on the line. I look down as I furrow my eyebrows, not sure of what to say next.

Soon, I hear footsteps approaching, and I look up to see that it's just Rick. Only he's just wearing some blue jeans and a white shirt, not his cop uniform. As he walks past us to get to Lori, I see Andrea and Amy smirk a little. Not sure why they're doin' that, though. Maybe it's like on the movies, when a girl kisses a boy, and all their friends go ooh la la. Except, Andrea and Amy are only thinkin' it and not sayin' it.

"Honey, why don't you go on and find Carl? Play for a while," Lori says. I think that means she and Rick are gonna talk about somethin' and don't want me to hear. And if they don't want me to hear, then they're probably gonna talk about Merle.

"Yes, ma'am," I say quietly. I stand up and dust my shorts and legs off before walkin' away.

I think Carl is playing in the woods near camp. I saw him, Eliza, Louis, and Sophia all go out there, but I didn't join them because I wasn't sure if my dad would want me out in the woods where a lot of bad things could happen.

So I still decide that I should wait for my dad to come back. Then I'll ask him if I can go play with the other kids.

Until then, I think I'll just go back to me and dad's tent and draw a picture. Maybe I'll draw one for him so that he's not so mad when he finds out about Merle.

But I don't even make it halfway there before I hear people screaming. Kids screaming. I can hear Carl yelling for his mama. I snap my head around and I see all the adults runnin' into the woods, so I follow after them even though I almost trip over my own feet.

By the time I catch up to everyone, I can see Rick, Shane, Glenn, T-Dog, Jim and Dale beatin' on a walker. I ain't never killed a walker. Only thing I ever killed was a worm because I stepped on it by accident. Anyway, they're beatin' and beatin' and beatin' on the walker until finally, Dale swings his axe, cutting the walker's head clean off.