Evelyn's Lesson In Recovery

Rudest Person Ever

I hit save on the word document I was working in for virtual school.  "Evelyn, come on!" Suzanne calls from the door.  I make sure I have my phone and we walk out to the car.  "Please don't give your new psychologist a hard time." she says.  My phone vibrates.  Harper sent me the same thing.  "Are you and Harper operating on the same wavelength?!" I ask.  She laughs.  "It seems we are." she says.  "Well, stop." I demand.

We pull in and I get out.  Suzanne leaves.  I go in and sign in.  I'm given a bunch of intake paperwork.  I quickly fill it out, having done it several times before.  I give it back to the receptionist and sit back down.  "Evelyn James?" a slightly demanding looking woman calls.  I hesitate before standing and walking over to her.  Her blonde, straight, flowing hair falls down her back.  Her pale, radiant face is framed by her hair.  Expressive, slightly cold blue eyes, set high in their sockets scan the waiting room.  Freckles are spread delicately over her face, matching her hair well.  

I follow her to the end of the hall and into an office.  I shiver at the temperature difference.  "Sorry about that, my room is always the first to cool down and the first to heat up." she says, a genuine smile revealing straight white teeth.  I don't speak or respond in any way.  "As Harper has told you, I'm Tracy, your new psychologist.  How are you?" she introduces herself, sitting down and motioning to a seat across from her.

I sit down, still not responding.  I look around her office nervously.  It is a slightly expansive room with soft indoor lighting.  The walls are painted a soft amber color broken up by sheer, springtime green curtains over the windows.  There are framed landscapes hanging on the walls, hanging perfectly straight.  I shake my head, Tracy seems to be a perfectionist.  "Evelyn, how are you doing?" Tracy asks again.  I continue ignoring her.  I only trust Harper; I'm not going to open up to this idiot!  She doesn't know anything about me and she's not going to be able to help me.

"You have got to speak to me, Evelyn.  I know how you were with Harper and I am not going to let you be the same way.  The way you acted with her showed you were too used to walking over people and having them tiptoe around how  you feel.  Harper is too afraid you'll have a panic attack or 'violent' outburst, but I'm not.  I will tell you how things are, straightforwardly.  The way you're acting now is showing you're an immature brat." she says.  I look at her, genuinely surprised she said that the very first time I'm meeting her.  "Surprised?" she asks.

I don't respond.  "Of course you are.  No one has ever said those things towards you the very first time you've spoken to them and you don't like it.....at all." Tracy says.  I cross my arms and sit back.  "Why are you closing yourself off?  I can see it through your body language that you're not open or willing for me to help you.  That's all I've seen from you." she asks.  I stare out the window, my anxiety really high.  I'm really intimidated by her sitting across from me and I'm really angry that she would say those things to me.

I pull out my phone and angrily text Harper.  "Really?!" I send.  I put my earbuds in and try to zone out.  Tracy takes my earbuds from me.  I glare at her, my anger growing.  Soon, if I can't distract myself, I'm going to lose my temper.  "You seem rather uncomfortable around me.  Is there a reason?" she asks.  I shrug.  She smiles and says "there's a little interaction...."  I roll my eyes and go back to ignoring her.  

The hour passes by in this way.  "You can go.  I'll see you in a few days." she sighs.  I quickly leave, desperate to get out of the uncomfortable room.  I meet Suzanne outside and we leave.  My phone vibrates.  "How'd it go?" Harper asked.  "I didn't speak to her and she was horribly rude." I reply.  "You can't transfer back to me until you're making good progress with her." Harper sends.  "Forget you." I respond, silencing my phone and putting it in my pocket.  I hate my life and today has sucked so bad!