The Beauty Beneath The Beast

Chapter 10: Peeta

Katniss still isn't really talking to me. She'll says good morning and good night, but the rest of the time, she sits in her room, singing. All kind of songs. Love songs, ballads, anything with a steady tune. I don't know why. I don't question it. If that's how she's healing, then I'll let her do it.

As I walk by, I hear hear her playing a guitar. I don't have any idea where she got that. I can't help but stop and listen to her sing.

"I've sure enjoyed the rain
but I'm looking forward to the sun
You have to feel the pain
when you lose the love you gave someone
I thought by now the time
would take away these lonely tears
I hope you're doing fine all alone,
but where do I go from here 'cause

Without you I'm not okay
And without you
I've lost my way
My heart's stuck
in second place ooh
Without you

Well I never thought I'd be
lying here without you by my side
It seems unreal to me that
the life you promised was a lie
You made it look so easy
making love into memories
I guess you got what you wanted
but what about me 'cause

Without you I'm not okay
And without you
I've lost my way
My heart's stuck
in second place ooh
Without you

Somebody tell my head to try to tell my heart
That I'm better off without you
'Cause baby I can't live

Without you I'm not okay
And without you
I've lost my way
My heart's stuck
in second place ooh
Without you...Without you

I hear her get up so I move to where I'm not standing right outside her door. She peeks her head out and when she sees me, she gives a small smile before walking down the hall. Away from me.

"Hey Katniss," I call after her. She turns to look at me.

"Yeah?" she asks.

"Are you okay?" I ask her. "You haven't actually spoken to me in a long time."

"I'm getting better," she says. "I know I'm not myself yet, but I know I'm over the rise."

"Are you feeling better enough to let me spend some time with you?" I ask her.

"If you want to," she says. "Its your castle." She walks towards the ballroom and I follow her. She sits down at the piano and runs her fingers over the keys.

"Do you know how to play?" I ask her.

"I did," she says. "But not for a long time."

"I'd like to hear it," I say. She starts pressing the keys, her hands dancing across them at a steady pace. She hums softly before she starts singing.

"You never looked so good
As you did last night
Underneath the city lights
There walking with your friend
Laughing at the moon
I swear you looked right through me
But I'm still living with your goodbye
And you're just going on with your life," and I sing the chorus with her.

"How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye?
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me?
Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all" She smiles at me as she continues.

"You, I hear you're doing fine
Seems like you're doing well
As far as I can tell
Time is leaving us behind
Another week has passed
And still I haven't laughed yet
So tell me what your secret is?
To letting go, letting go like you did, like you did" I join in with her again and she smiles shyly.

"How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye?
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me?
Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

Did you forget the magic?
Did you forget the passion?
Did you ever miss me
Ever long to kiss me?

Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all

You, you never looked so good" She turns to me and smiles.

"You have a nice voice," she says.

"No where near as beautiful as yours," I say making her blush.

"Yeah," she says. "I've noticed you appreciate it." I give her a weird look and she laughs. "I've been a hunter for years, Peeta. You think I wouldn't hear you from behind the door. I've pretty much developed a sixth sense when it comes to detecting others around me."

"At least you're laughing again," I say.

"Yeah," she says. "I guess I am." She takes my hand. "I've missed this. Just us hanging around and being friends again."

"I've missed it too," I say. "I've really, really missed you Katniss."

"Why?" she asks. "I haven't gone anywhere."

"You haven't been here either though," I say. She looks down at our joined hands and sighs.

"I know I haven't," she says. "I kept trying to get myself to come out of there. I don't know how many times I stood by my door and would reach for the door handle only to not be able to turn it. It's just, everything changed so quickly. I know you're still you, but it's like you aren't the same anymore."

"Katniss, I know it's weird, but I'm still your friend. I still love you like I did before," I say.

"I know," she says. "And I love you too. But I just don't understand anything anymore. Nothing feels real anymore."

"I can make it feel real," I whisper. I lean in and so does she. I give her a kiss that she returns. She breaks away and laughs.

"You're so cheesy," she says laughing.

"It made you happy," I say.

"You always make me happy," she says. "How we ended up together may not be the most innocent story. I really don't like how this happened at all. But I still care about you. I still love you. You did what you thought you needed to do. It wasn't the right thing, but you weren't thinking clearly. I see that now. And that's why I'm still here. If I wanted to be gone, I would be by now. But I don't. I'm happy here. I'd be happy living out the rest of my life here, with you."

"You really mean that?" I ask her.

"Well yeah," she says. "Prim is the only family I have left, and who knows when she'll actually return. But this is my home now Peeta. This is where I belong. With you. Isn't that what you want?"

"Of course it is," I say. "I just didn't think you really wanted to be here anymore."

"Of course I do silly," she says. "I told you what I saw. I told you about our children. According to our eldest, I will feel her moving inside me within the year. And while I never thought, in a million years I would say this, I can't wait for that day to come."

And all I can think, is that I can't wait either.