My Hero (Katsuki x Izuku)

8 - Captor Of My Dreams

IZUKU

I watch Bakugo walk past me without another word, confused at our interaction just now. Maybe he's starting to like my nickname for him, or maybe he's always liked it, and he's not afraid to admit it anymore. Though, why did he just walk away from me without saying anything? Normally, he would bite my head off, and then leave. He doesn't normally walk away without a word.

I sigh in defeat as I continue walking to class. As I trudge, I hear a familiar, soothing voice behind me say, "Deku! Wait up!" I turn around and Ochaco is waving at me with a bright smile on her face. I slow down so she can catch up and we continue walking down the halls together.

"Congrats on your win, Deku!" Ochaco chirps.

"Thanks, Uraraka!" I say. "Same to you! You did great, taking down Thirteen. That move was impressive."

Ochaco's pink cheeks glow brighter. "Thanks! I learned that from my internship a while back with Gunhead. Aoyama wasn't much help, though."

I laugh lightly. "Kacchan to my surprise was pretty helpful, despite saying numerous times that he could beat our opponent on his own."

"That's Bakugo for you," Ochaco giggles.

I laugh along with her, and my mind goes back to when we attended the Valentine's Day dance together. We haven't been on a one-on-one date since then, but I'm not sure if I want to go on a date with her again. I think I still have romantic feelings for her—I have since we met—but my feelings for Kacchan have started to blossom, and they're growing stronger as the days go by. It's not fair to Ochaco if I go out with her when I'm not even sure who I like and who I'd rather be involved with—her, or Kacchan? The obvious choice should be Ochaco; she's kind to me, and she appreciates my company, and it seems that she returns my feelings. But I still have some sort of unfathomably confusing attraction to Kacchan—my childhood best friend who has been bullying me ever since his quirk manifested. He's treated me like old gum on the heel of his shoe, yet I still admire him and I see him as well as treat him like he's the best person to have ever walked the earth; if you were to ever ask me who my favorite person is, it'd be Kacchan. But I could never tell you why.

"Hey Deku?" Ochaco asks.

"Yeah?" I say.

"Do you maybe... want to go out again soon?"

I'm startled by her question; she must've read the wrong parts of my mind. "Oh, uh... About that, uh..." I stutter helplessly. How do I tell her this casually without hurting her? Should I tell her, or should I go out with her anyway, so I won't hurt her? Should I walk away like Bakugo did when we were chatting earlier? What do I do?

"Deku, you're mumbling again," Ochaco says. My hand flies to my mouth in abashment. Of course, I have to mumble when I should be keeping my mouth shut the most.

"Sorry!" I yelp. "Anyways, uhh... I think maybe, uh... We should...not."

Ochaco's hope-filled eyes drain and become dull and I immediately start stumbling over my words in an attempt to explain myself, "I, uh, it's not that I don't like you, but it's just, uh... that I, uh... I... I'm having i-issues and I don't think we should together do—I MEAN do anything together in terms of, um, going out until I get my mind sorted out."

Ochaco looks at me, confused. "I barely understood any of that."

I laugh nervously. "Sorry... To summarize the mess that just came out of my mouth, I don't think it's a good idea... until I get things sorted out in my head. I like you, but I..."

I like Kacchan, too.

"It's okay, Deku," Ochaco says with a smile on her face; a smile that was traced on with the sadness of the dark sky on a rainy day. I want to be the sun for her, but I can't. I can't even shine with the brightness of the moon, all because of some boy I should've viewed as my foe and not my friend.