Love Games

Fory - four: Trapped in the black room

I wake up alone in his room, surrounded by thick blackness. Soft, silky black sheets cover my body, their fabric gliding gently over my skin as I realize - he has left me alone again.

It always happens the same way, as if this moment of loss and emptiness is some kind of ritual for him.

I look around the room; everything around me is in shades of dark, deep black that almost swallows up every detail.

It's like waking up in the middle of the night. Only the faint light filtering through the curtains reminds me that it is day outside.

Slowly, with every movement, I feel the pain - every muscle, every fibre in me is tense and I can feel the marks of the night before.

I get out of bed, my legs heavy, soft, as if I were walking on water. I realize that I am naked, as if stripped naked, left to the morning and the solitude.

I approach the window, carefully open the curtains, and the light blinds me for a moment.

In front of me I see a green expanse stretching towards the distant mountains. There are no houses nearby, just a few distant roofs lost in the morning mist.

The view is rugged and untouched, yet peaceful.

I open the door to the balcony and the cold air rushes in. It envelops me, chills me until I feel a tingling sensation spread across my skin.

I shiver and jump back to the sheet, wrapping it around me like a long, dark dress that falls softly against my body.

I stand barefoot on the cool floor of the balcony, feeling every breath of the cool morning and smelling something clean, fresh, almost wild.

I look around - how different this is from Sicily, where the warmth was all-encompassing and soft, and the mornings opened with the scent of the sea and rosemary.

Here the air is sharp, almost cold.

Somewhere inside me I feel a mixture of wonder and emptiness, overwhelmed by the light, the cool wind and the peace that a new morning brings.

I remain on the balcony, wrapped in a black sheet that flutters around me as if it were part of the morning wind.

The silence is deep, filled with the distant sounds of nature - the rustling of leaves, the singing of birds, the sound of the wind as it gently travels through the hills and valleys.

I lower my eyes to the view before me, this green expanse that both soothes and frightens me. So remote, so cold, yet strangely beautiful.

This moment in which I am caught seems like something that does not belong to my life, like a scene from a movie that I am watching from afar.

I feel the emptiness she left behind again, but this time it is different, almost friendly, like a distant memory that no longer hurts me.

I take a deep breath of the cold air and let it slowly wake me up.

I am aware of every part of my body awakening with each breath.

It feels like being reborn - here, in this unfamiliar house, with this expansive view, wrapped in a sheet that is the only remaining proof that the night before even existed.

I move back into the room, where there is still a slight warmth. I let the sheets slip from my shoulders and let myself be embraced by the morning that slowly pours in through the windows.

In this moment, caught between light and shadow, I feel something new - a determination, a strange calm.

I promise myself that I will discover who I am when I am not standing next to him, who I am in this new, wild landscape that stretches before me.