The US of A

Parenting Is No Joke or 'You'd Never Understand'

"Lovi you were so sweet as a child... but now you grew up and are so grumpy," Spain pouted childishly. Currently Romano was screaming obscenities at very irked Germany.

"Shut up tomato bastard! Can't you see I'm trying to teach this potato bastard that he isn't so great?He has no right to tell me what to do!" Romano then continued to pelt Germany with Tomatoes. "Take that! And that! AND THAT!!!"

"Lovi stop wasting the tomatoes!" Spain cried. His precious tomatoes! And he worked so hard to grow them. Now they were being thrown at a Germany. And Germany was a nice guy. Besides it's not like he was committing the crime of bad entertainment. Though he was boring sometimes, like now! But that is besides the point. The point is tomatoes!

England patted Spain's back in sympathy. "No need to fret Spain, we've all had our fair share in children...except America." America was busy eating his burger to notice his name was spoken. "I remember when America was just a tot. Then he became this bloody idiot over there!"

"It would be so nice if they could stay innocent and nice. But it's better like this I suppose." Spain sighed dramatically before proceeding. "Before Lovi was so lazy and messy. Sleeping most of the time and not doing his chores. That or he was eating like a slob."

"Hey, I'm right here!" an angry Romano yelled. The last they could do was acknowledge his presence for goodness sake. Spain and Britain continued their discussion of raising children. "hey! Heeeey~" he whined. 

Prussia who wasn't too far from them thought about what it was like to raise Germany. "Germany was a bit troublesome as a child. He was still a good child though. It took a while for him to to stop being so shy and he was always a good hider. So finding him was a bit of a problem." China who over heard him nodded in understatement. 

"Yes, children are complicated, aru." He sulked at the thought of raising Japan, Hong Kong, Taiwan, and both North and South Korea. "So troublesome and most of mine are back stabbers, aru!" e huffed.

"Japan was always rude to me, aru. Your lucky you had a nice child to care for." China hugged his panda in remorse. Prussia laughed. "Of course the awesome me had a perfect little brother. He's almost as awesome as me. ALMOST. And since I'm so awesome, my awesome parenting skills made Germany an almost as awesome as me nation!" 

Germany stood there stiffly. He hated when Prussia mentioned what he was like as a kid. It wasn't his fault he was shy! I mean it could happen to any kid honestly. "Prussia you know not of vat you are talking about." He tried to say calmly but the twitching of his eyes told another tale.

"Mr. Germany sound like-a cute bambino," Italy said curiously. He looked at Germany and tried to picture a cute little kid in his place. Italy shook his head. "Nope, ve~?" 

Austria sighed. "Yes Italy was a strange child, and troublesome, and clumsy." 

"Oh he wasn't that bad. He was the cutest thing ever!" Hungary cooed as she glomped Italy. "He still is and so sweet too. Never causes a fuss during wars!"

"That's because he always runs away," Germany mumbled.

France turned to Canada. Lately everyone has been noticing Canada more and more, so that's good. Also they don't confuse him with America as much either, I guess that's something. "Mathieu was such a quiet child. Never had a problem with him." He then proceeded to pet the the shy nation's head affectionately.

"At least your is still a good child!" Britain screeched.

"Oh, is ze Great Bretagne jealous of mio?" French asked teasingly. Britian began to screech profanities at the other nation.

Canada watched in exasperation. He looked over to his brother and sighed. America seemed to be taking this well.

America looked calm on the outside but inside he was furious. They thought he couldn't handle kids, HA! He has to handle 52 kids. Lets see how they handle it. And he's only been doing it for a few years so since I'm still alive... I guess I'm doing a good job! I mean he had no knowledge in being a care taker but they his kids still loved him. He loved them. Seeing as he is one one of the younger nations (293 years old {2015}) he should get some credit, none of them had ever handled so many children; at the same time! I wonder how they'd react if they knew?

Of they'd rue the day they said Alfred F. Jones couldn't handle kids!v MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!