Heart Strings

chemistry ;

he had hands that looked like they could mine silver from my core, and a gaze that looked like it could make tungsten melt into rivers that flow. he had a way of making me feel like all the carbon in my body had turned into diamonds underneath my skin, 'no honey you've been through so much pressure, honestly you're almost there, i've never seen anything more stronger' and maybe that's why my sick little heart started hoping for a cure for the toxic blood it spewed out with each beat, because i believed he could neutralize the acidity running through my veins and spreading to my feet. i have bones lined with arsenic and lungs peppered with sulfur and i am poison myself but somehow he found a way to not lose himself within my wrath, and all the crystallized words that fell from his tongue dissolved in the solvent of my soul until i was saturated with nothing but him, until i felt like he was more me than i am myself, but i embraced that because before he came along i was empty and null, i am not miscible, and i never have been, but god, he turned me into things i never thought i could be. i remember the night he laid me like a paper chromatogram on the floor, with all my layers bleeding out separately around me; he picked out every last impurity imprinted inside my folds and told me that he would love all of me, the parts with fixed boiling temperatures and the parts without. and maybe that's why i fantasize every night about kissing him under bismuth skies and maybe that's why my lips ache so hard to taste the salt under his skin and maybe that's why my teeth ache so hard to dig into the mountains along his back, maybe sparks will fly when our fingertips touch, maybe fireworks will explode between my upper lip and his lower one, maybe, just maybe all these things will happen because oh god, i want them to. i want to tread through every single crevice and uncover all the secrets scattered like minerals around his veins, and shape his cliff sides with the water flowing down my cheeks. i want to dip myself into him and feel the heat enveloping me when acid finds base because we're opposites, and yes, opposites attract and we're perfect for each other, we're perfect for each other because we pull each other into equilibrium and the most stable place for him is in my arms, and the most stable place for me is in his. for something so toxic, i react with him to form something beautiful, and if that isn't chemistry, i will never learn what is.

- (for you i would peel off the rustic and allow myself to react. only for you), s.m.