The Greatest Mistake

One

It's 3:15am, my room is cold, yet I have my fan on. My body is freezing, but I'm not covered up. My phone is ringing, but I'm not picking it up. I'm sure if someone walked into my room, they'd almost expect me to be dead. My body is still, and lifeless. I'm breathing, but just barely. I'm screaming to myself in my head, "AVERY GET UP, AVERY ANSWER THAT PHONE." I can't bring myself to do it. No matter how badly I want to move in this moment, I am numb. Totally and completely paralyzed with fear and confusion. I'm experiencing emotions that I haven't, in my entire life, felt before. I blame him. That vile, terrible, horrible, human being. He saw me, wanted me, got what he wanted, kissed my forehead, and left me. No, no. He didn't rape me. It was 100% consensual. I wouldn't be mad at all. Except he forgot to take something with him when he left. Something that wouldn't be quite ready for 8 months. That's right. I Avery Jane Milestone am pregnant. I have made this biggest mistake of my life, and career all because of a teenage fantasy come to life. It was just suppose to be a crazy story to tell my friends. Maybe make them jealous a bit. I would brag "I got to sleep with a pop star." They'd all be intrigued and totally hanging at every bit of this story, and then I'd get to tell them the best part "I haven't even told you who... This isn't any particular pop star... I slept with.... Harry..... Harry styles." They'd shriek and squeal, and I would set there confident and proud. But this isn't a story to tell friends. This is a nightmare. Thankfully my thoughts have made me completely nauseous so I have to get out of bed, so I can make it the toilet to expell what was inside of my almost empty to begin with, stomach. I should be used to the throwing up by now because I haven't stopped for the past two weeks. It's not just the morning either. It's morning, noon, evening, 3,4,5 am, so I'm not sure why they continue to call it "morning sickness" when it happens all day, everyday. I quickly flush the toilet, and pull myself up from the cool tile floor. I turn on the faucet and place my hands underneath the cool water and begin to splash some on my face before I brush my teeth. The water feels nice, against my clammy, pale, skin. I star in the mirror as I brush my teeth, and instantly begin to cry. Who is going to believe me? What am I going to do. Harry himself won't believe me. I don't know what to do, I can't tell anyone. Everyone will be wondering who's baby it is, and this isn't just something you can blame on someone and hope they accept the answer and move on. People are going to want to know the father. Oh god... My family... They are going to want to know the father. They know about my love for one direction. I bet you anything they will assume it's a lie, and I'm covering for a one night stand. I won't be able to blame anyone for not believing me, the truth sounds a bit of a lie to even myself. No doubt this will be the hardest, most difficult thing I will every have to go through in my life. My career will suffer, my social life will suffer, and I'm suddenly angry with this little being in my stomach. My little. I put both of my hands on my belly and sob. My thoughts are flying around my head a hundred miles per hour. Suddenly in panicking and speaking to my stomach out loud. "I just can't have you here. No one will believe me. Your father won't even know you exist, and I won't be able to contact him. We'll be alone, this isn't fair to you. I'll be a horrible mother, and I just can't do this." I'm going insane, I think I'm hyperventilating. I have to remind myself to breathe, I just can't do it properly between sobs. I don't believe in abortion. I just can't do it. It's not this babies fault that his "dad" can't use a condom properly. After I freak out, and cry. Cry some more and freak out again. I land on one conclusion. I, Avery, am in fact pregnant. This is Harry Styles baby. And I am totally, 100%, not sure what to do.