And Scene [H.S]

scene twenty-six

AVIE STYLES

The past few days have been a whirlwind to put it lightly. I've been thrown from pillar to post, both physically and emotionally. I wasn't sure which way was up anymore and it was causing havoc in my brain, though still, I just had to keep powering through like none of this was killing me, like my world wasn't falling apart bit by bit every day. It was quite possibly the hardest role I've ever had to play and the toughest act I've had to train for.

The world was still turning. The sun was still rising and the birds kept singing. Just because I wanted to fall apart and hide under the covers until this horrible nightmare was over, it didn't mean I could. The rest of the world kept going and so that meant I had to do the same. I couldn't just succumb to it all, even if I wanted to, what courage did that show?

From the moment that Effie returned home after two days in a hospital bed, I promised myself that I wouldn't cry again. I told myself that I had to be strong and that from that day forwards, I was going to put this constant doom and gloom behind us. I didn't want it to keep eating me alive and so it had been two days since I had let out a single tear.

It was almost like I had just become completely numb to it all and whilst I was still feeling so many emotions inside, none of it ever came out. I kept my lips tightly shut, and my eyes were dry. I think it was quite possibly the longest I had gone without crying. Though two days wasn't exactly a record, these past two days had felt like a lifetime.

Things between Harry and I had been a little confusing to say the least. He had been staying at his parents house for the past two nights, taking Scout along with him to give Effie and I some space, though my heart had been aching without my baby boy. Harry had been sending me photos pretty much hourly, phoning me multiple times a day just so I could hear Scout's sweet little babbles and FaceTiming me so I could see his beautiful face.

Harry had been going above and beyond to make sure Scout and I were still connected whilst we were apart, though I was confident that it'd only be another day or two until my parents physically forced me to take a break and go back home. As much as I wanted to be by Effie's side, I was also dying for my little boy. I just couldn't be in two places at once, but I was certain my parents would soon take over and send me back home where I belonged to take hold of my baby whilst they took hold of theirs.

They had arrived in London the day Effie got discharged from hospital and whilst it was clear they wanted to be at Effie's side at every passing minute, Effie had very quickly voiced that it was all too much. They always have the best intentions at heart, but I think they were slightly suffocating Effie and so she had told them that they were free to visit and spend time with her, but she couldn't have them in her face at all hours of the day, it was driving her insane.

Effie just wanted space right now. She wanted to be left alone to sleep the days away, slowly recovering from the drugs that had poisoned her system, not being coddled and questioned. She had a lot to process and a lot going on in that mind of hers. None of this was easy, especially for her, so we just had to accept the fact that she needed alone time. Surrounding her and demanding more of her wasn't an option, we had been down this road before, and we all knew that she just needed time, that's all it boils down to.

Effie had been finding it hard, but I suppose that wasn't breaking news to anybody. I thought that once she was back in her own home, things may start to ease up a little, I thought that maybe she would be back to her usual self, snacking in the kitchen and gossiping about terrible TV series. I guess I was the fool for thinking that life could just go back to normal so quickly after her life had been on the line.