Stronger than Me

187 4 11
                                    

Amy's POV
September 11,2010
3:01pm

"Amy!Amy! Over here can we ask you some questions?!"

"Amy we heard you divorced Blake is it true?!

" What are heading tonight Amy?"

"Amy are you under the influence of narcartics as we speak?!"

I had left out my home in the heart of london with my mum and dad. They covered me as we got into the escalade on our way to the airport to the United States.
After all the mess I've been through really need help, but they don't care.

I really did need this trip. A break from everything. I can finally clear my head, and be at peace without having everyone down my thoart about my personal life. I'm going to be touring a little and work on some music all while getting my life together.

Ya See, At home they take my addiction and my problems as a joke. It's like I was their clown and all of the UK was my audience. Unlike the US they actually care about people with my sort of problems and go out their way to make sure I get the treatment I need.

After I do get clean in UK, I go right back to London to start a habit all over again. Its like I'm stuck in the middle of the ocean and no matter how much I swim I can't touch the ocean floor or get close to it. Sooner or later I'm just gonna get tired of swimming and that'll be the end it all. That's why I need this help for the sake of my image and self-care.

The ride to the airport and the flight was quiet. My parents didn't say anything. I bet they're sick of me like I'm sick of me self.
I called them yesterday, I don't remember the exact words that came out of my mouth, but all I know is that; I was crying and begging for them to take my away from London. They came, made arrangements, and packed some bags now here we are.

I looked out the plane's window and looked at the clouds. Majority of them were cumulus white fluffy ones with such purity, but there was one that was dark full of emotions that's just waiting for the right place and time to release it. I kept looking at it cause it reminded me to much of me self.

"Amy," I heard my dad call me.

"Yeah dad?"

"Look at the camera. What are you thinking about?"
My dad has a fasination with cameras, but instead of being professional cameraman he is a cab driver, and has been one ever since I could remember. when I was born they pushed all their dreams aside and built their lives around me. Anything I wanted to do in my life they supported me, and what they got in return is a famous junkie who's to stupid to do better.

I looked over with a blank stare then back to the window. I didn't want him to see me hurt.

"What's the matter, Amy?" He questions.

I swallowed the lump in my throat before speaking, "I-I don't know what's the matter with me honestly." I laid my head back into seat still looking out the window.

"Amy, its gonna be okay when we get to the states we're gonna get you right back to your old self again. Promise."

I sighed." Yeah whatever you say. Turn the recorder off now, please."

I heard the button press and he heard him move to the empty seat next to me."Amy, if there's something bothering you tell me. Don't bottle yourself up-"

"Dad, I-I feel like I'm worthless. I'm a burden." My tears finally ran down my face.

"Oh, Amy." He wrapped his arms around me pulling me to a embrace, my cloud had bursted and I cried into his shoulder." "Its okay dear, people have to be at the lowest to go higher. This is just another obstacle and its up to you to go through with it or walk away." My dad always had a way of words and my mum too. life has blessed me with the best parents in the world.

"Don't worry everything is fine." He assured.

I cried meself to sleep in my dads arms. I hope by me going to states can really help. This is my last chance. My last chance to prove them all wrong.
†††††

Nas POV

Come on Nas your losing it man. You haven't put shit out. Your losing ya flame. I need to get back in the studio.

Before I turnt 30, I thought I would be laid back in a beach house with a wife and some kids at that point . Shit, I was dead wrong. I'm now divorced and my daughter is outta of control. She thinks its my fault that me and her mom broke up but she was the one cheating.

She was the one who was fucking around when I was on tours making the money that kept her in a 6 bedroom house with 4 cars in the garage. She put an end to 15 year marrige for 15 minutes.

It's just fucked up that you go all out for a person only for them to screw you over in the end. I'm reliving my pain and mind with the only thing that I truly love...Music.

I called up Common to see what he was up to.

Common:Yo

Me:Sup man I'm in the studio.

Common: Its about time. People starting to think you died or something.

Me:The way I am right now death sounds peaceful.

We laughed.

Common: So you got some things down. I can drop by tonight and we can get some tracks down.

Me:Alright see ya.

Common:Alright peace.

I got off the phone with Common and turned on the TV that hung on the wall in my studio.

Hello and welcome back to E! news. Grammy winning singer Amy Winehouse is coming to LA bound LAX for Rehab.
"I guess she finally said yes "
Joked tiger.

Amy well also be recording after 2 years and a world concert in the near hopeful future...

Damn I met her before. Shit I forgot but her face is fimilar. Maybe I can get in touch and see if she wants to record.

First I got to get word out that I'm back. So why not a birthday bash...

†††††

So what do you think?

Amy?

Nas?

Keep or Delete?

I've had this story on my mind ever since Amy died and Nas came out with Cherry Wine.

(That rhymed don't ask why.)

I hope y'all love this story.

I love y'all like XO.

KEEP CALM AND KEEP READING...

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