I come to fight. Or at least, to listen.

chapter 12

Chapter 12

~Cracks~

Musichetta helped Evelyn hoist the new purchases up to her room. Evelyn unboxed her new wicker bonnet, placing the fake-flowered and ribboned head piece on her vanity.

"I had a great time today!" Musichetta trilled, removing Joly's sister's clothes from the armoire.

"I did too!" Evelyn agreed, smiling. It was good to have another girl to talk to. Evelyn also looked up to her in a way. Musichetta was refined, easily fitting in with the upper class. She could use to take up some of the manners.

Evelyn folded her nightgown, putting it into the lowest drawer of the dresser.

Musichetta glanced at her watch, "Oh my, look at the time! I have rehearsal in the morning," She turned to Evelyn, clasping her hands together, "Please come to the show! I can get you tickets! It's next month."

"I would love to!" They embraced, and Musichetta whirled out the door.

Evelyn plopped down on her bed and reached for the smallest box. She pulled out the ivory hair comb and ran her fingers over the intricate carvings. Joly called her from downstairs.

...

Thoughts swirled in Enjolras's mind, refusing to be coherent. Apathy was replaced with rage and frustration.

...

Joly was waiting for Evelyn in the parlor. Warm pastries were on a tray, resting on the coffee table. Evelyn chose a flaky circle with red jam in the center. Evelyn gave Joly a warm smile. "Monsieur I cannot thank you enough," said when she had finished her pastry.

"Please, think nothing of it, mademoiselle," Joly replied, then excused himself.

A few moments later, Evelyn saw Enjolras standing in the door frame, an uncharacteristically dark expression on his face. Nevertheless, Evelyn lit up when she saw him finally out of bed.

Enjolras strode out towards her and stopped about a foot away.

"Why?" he yelled. His gray eyes smoldered, narrow with rage. Evelyn was stunned.

Enjolras yelled again, "Why? Why did you save me?" Evelyn tried to defend herself, but the words wouldn't come out.

His voice escalated to screaming, "I was supposed to die!" Evelyn could see a crack run down his marble face. Tears started to well in Evelyn's eyes. Stop that, she willed them.

Pent-up pain flowed out with his words, "I'm supposed to be with my friends! You took that away from me!" His voiced cracked on "away"

The marble man had shattered. He gasped for air, his expression like a cornered animal. Evelyn just stood there, mouth agape, eyes watering. She felt defensive and mildly afraid, but more importantly, she felt sadness. Here he was, blaming himself for the deaths of his friends. For the death of Combeferre and Courfeyrac. For the death of Jehan and Grantaire. For the death of Gavroche.

Evelyn tried to rationalize that he wasn't in the right frame of mind. But his emotion was so raw, she found it hard to focus on anything besides being yelled at. She tried to decide between yelling back at him or giving him a hug.

Enjolras felt shame. He watched as her usually defiant attitude melted. She was taking to heart everything he was saying. Which is what he intended, but he assumed she would be able to handle this, out of impulse. He didn't mean for it to cut this deep.

Evelyn swallowed her pride and gently brought her hand to his cheek, cradling his face, looking straight into his eyes with a sympathetic gaze.

Enjolras was confused. Why, after all this, was she still showing kindness? He was expecting a solid punch to the jaw. There she goes again, defying expectations.

Evelyn wiped the tear that rolled down his cheek with her thumb.

He fell into her, wrapping his arms around her waist, burying his sobs into her.

Evelyn kept her head on his chest, feeling it bounce it around as his chest moved up and down as he drew in ragged breaths.

Joly walked past the door to inspect the commotion, but as he walked past them in an embrace, he decided to play match-maker and let them have their little moment.

...

Evelyn held Enjolras until his sobs faded to the occasional uneven breath. She stepped back, running her hands down his arms. His face spoke of confusion and he held his gaze to the floor. His face wasn't twisted anymore, and Evelyn could swear his eyes had tuned to a pale shade of blue. She gave his hands a reassuring squeeze, then kissed him on the cheek. Enjolras's eyes widened and felt his heart beat a little faster, just a little.

Evelyn walked out the parlor and up to her room, leaving Enjolras staring at the floor with his hands on his hips.

He ran a hand through his golden curls, settling on the couch.

...

Evelyn changed into her new nightgown, which was tailored perfectly to her. She undid her hair from the topknot, letting it fall in waves down her back.

Today was exhausting, but even in her cloud-of-a-bed she couldn't sleep. She felt a little guilty, as if Enjolras was right.

She rolled over to her other side, letting out a heavy sigh. She was glad she comforted him, but she tried to justify the things he said in her mind. He was just upset. He just needed to let out his feelings, and I just happened to be the outlet for it. He had a mental breakdown. That's expected. Most of his friends just died. Christ, that's horrible. Evelyn felt a wave of despair wash over her. Push it down. Push it down. Feelings don't help anything. You need to focus on helping Enjolras get better. Joly has Musichetta. Enjolras has nobody. I have nobody.