Being Destiny (Sammy wilkinson fanfic)

27

Destiny
"I mean I'm not even sure if I do. I still love Sam, and it's not like I could just get over him with a snap of my fingers but after today, my mind has been all messed up," I sigh. The look Cameron gives me makes me kinda nervous to know what he's thinking. "Look Des, no one can tell you how to feel only you can do that. You just have to trust your heart. Your head can tell you anything you want to think, but only your heart can give you what you really want," Cam says after thinking for what seemed like hours. I slightly nod my head letting him know that I understand what he says and all that. I thank him then go back to my room and start thinking about everything and really taking Cams advice into consideration.

Sure Matt is someone I care about but do I like him as more than a friend or do I just enjoy his company. As some sick and twisted way to fill the emptiness that Sammy left. There's so much about Matt that I like, he just has the ability to make me laugh no matter what mood I'm in. He's always been there for me from Sam heartbreak number one to now. Then there's Sammy, my high school sweetheart. The first guy I ever truly loved and the one who I still love. Or maybe that's just it, he's only my high school sweetheart and nothing more than that. Maybe we weren't suppose to last outside of high school. Then there's that part of me that believes he's my one and only and that we are destined to be together.
Here's the thing, I'm pretending I don't miss him, and he's pretending not to care, egos one hell of a drug. I still have no idea whatsoever about my decision. I just need some time to think things over, and decide something with a clear head. I have to really think this through, or things with Matthew and Sammy will get messier than they already are. My heart is saying something completely different than what head is telling me. What do you then? When your head and heart are in two different places, do you follow your heart like every fairytale tells you to go or do you go with what your head is telling you, because it's the most logical?

~~

Time has passed and we decided to have a pop-up event for the fans, in a nearby venue who was more than happy to allow us to use the venue for our event. Once all the details were sorted out we went to go get ready. I first showered then quickly blow dry it and curl it in loose curls. For my makeup I decided to do a little bit more than usual. I put on foundation, then do a lighter Smokey eye, then black liner and mascara. I grab a pair of black ripped jeans, a black t-shirt, a denim flannel, and my black booties and throw it on, tying the denim shirt around my waist. On the way to the venue I can't help but think of me doing this is the right thing, my life changed dramatically when I joined, and I don't regret any of it, but I don't know if I should still be here.
I walk downstairs into the living room and my eyes automatically connect with Matt's and I feel a smile forming on my face. Maybe he is the right choice, I know I'll be able to trust him either my heart. I walk over to Matt and take a seat next to him on the couch while we wait for everyone else to come downstairs.
"So what have you been up to Matty?" I ask him, since he did get up and leave this morning saying he had something to take care of. "Oh not much, I met up with an old friends and talked about some things," he replies turning to smile at me. At that same moment I feel my cheeks heat up and a smile of my very own starting to form, I quickly turn away so Matt can't see. "Wait, did I just catch you blushing? Was the Destiny Johnson actually blushing?" Matt teases me, while poking at my sides. I break out in a fit of laughter, begging him to stop, and squirming desperately trying to escape his grasp. I squirm and squirm his desperately trying to get out of his grasp when our eyes lock together. He stops tickling me but I don't bother to move instead we lock eyes and everything around us, fades away. We gaze into each others, and then Matt makes the ever so slightest move towards me. I mimic him and close the already thin space between us, and our lips touch for the slightest moment. Then suddenly a certain person clears their throat thus ruining our moment and making us jump apart. I look up and see that the certain person was indeed my lovely older brother, giving me that oh-so brotherly look, which I return with a glare. Then Matthew stands up and announces that he will be waiting with the other in the car.