Publicity || Marco Reus

Chapter 18

Chapter eighteen

The next morning it took Marco a few moments to realize he was not in his own bedroom, and Essi was not there anymore. Not bothering to even try to get out of bed, he turned around, pulled the duvet up a little more and closed his eyes again. 

Essi was in the kitchen debating whether or not to make breakfast. She wanted to apologize to Marco, but at the same time she didn't know how. She never apologized. To no one. But for some reason she felt the need to apologize to Marco. Now that she knew that he never wanted this either, she wanted this to be over more than ever. It was obvious to her that she was only a burden here. 

In the end she started making breakfast for both her and Marco. When she finished that she went back to her own bedroom and saw Marco was still fast asleep. She set down the food and jumped on the bed, only to earn a groan from Marco. 

"Marcoo.." 

Another groan. 

"You want breakfast or not?" 

That seemed to interest him more, "You made breakfast?" he murmured. 

"Don't be so surprised." She looked at him unimpressed, "I want to apologize." 

Now Marco seemed confused, "for what?" 

"I don't know.. Just in general, for all this I guess. You never asked for this anyway." 

"It's still not your fault." He assured her. 

Essi shrugged her shoulders. She drifted off in her own thoughts while mindlessly eating her breakfast. 

After breakfast Marco left her room. He tried to talk to her some more, but she had been completely in her own world. She grabbed her notebook and started writing; something she hadn't done in a while and missed doing. 

Sometimes I just don't know anymore. It seems as if everything around me continues and I'm stuck here, in this moment. As if I'm being hold back, getting behind on all the others. Maybe in a way, I am. Everyone is moving forward and working on their future, whereas I don't even have a future. It's that simple, yet so complicated. 

I have no idea what I'm supposed to do with my life. I barely know what I'm supposed to do tomorrow, let alone in a few months or even a few years. 

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For Marco it wasn't easy to see what everyone around him saw. He was too in love to see it. Maybe he just didn't want to see it. Marco hadn't had much luck in love, and every time he thought he had found someone he discovered that they were only with him because he was in fact Marco Reus. He just didn't want to believe Melissa was another one of those cases.

He had been with her for almost a month now, and Melissa was starting to show her true colours. She was more interested in making sure the press got pictures of them, than in Marco himself.

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"So.." Marco started when they were both sat on the couch. "Would you mind if my family came over?"

"As long as I don't have to be there." She said in a tone Marco could not quite make out.

"That was the whole point." He said.

Essi sighed. "Why do I have to meet them?"

She didn't face Marco. Essi kept her eyes focused on the white wall straight in front of her, though she could feel his eyes pranging on her.

"You don't think it's weird that I have someone living with me, who my parents don't even know?"

"I'll be gone before you know it." She whispered.

"You'll be here at least another few months." Marco stated, "Now tell me the real reason why you don't want to meet any of my family or friends please." he pressed.

"That is the real reason."

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not." She said. Although they both knew she were. Essi didn't want to get to know Marco's family and friends. Partly because she didn't want to have it rubbed in her face that he had something she never had; a caring and loving family, and friends. And partly because she didn't want to get used to having that around her. Like Marco said, she was only going to be here for another few months and after that she would be on her own. She wouldn't have a family nor would she have friends. Since Essi was not planning on staying in Dortmund she most likely wouldn't be able to see any of the friends she made at her school again.

"Then I'm inviting them over."

"I won't be there."

"Yeah, you will."

"No, I won't. You can't make me." She stated stubbornly.

"You watch me."

"I will."

"Okay."

"Okay."

It was silent for a while before they both started laughing, and both trying not to.

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HAHA look who's back

I'm so soso so sorry for not updating and yes I know I say this all the time and I am literally the worst when it comes to updating regularly 

There are reasons why I haven't updated in so long and basically haven't even been online for so long, and those are kind of personal so I hope you understand and don't hate me too much for not updating. 

I guess updates will come more often from now on, at least I hope so (: 

Also excuse any mistakes, I didn't proof read it completely