portal (s.m)

2;

oh, how i wish, i could turn back time.
--

as i grabbed the square object, and took off the heavy lid, i opened the box, and in revealed, some letters, my old diary, video tapes, voice records, and all that stuff.

oh, how such objects can bring a memory back to life.

i started with the letters,

dear hailey,
10/25/14
you're mad at me, i know, and the moment when you I realized you were mad, my heart shattered to pieces, i know, the incident happened a few months ago, and you should know i broke up with her, because nothing feels right, it only feels right with you. anyways, knowing me, ill probably give this to you after graduation, which is a few days from now, or in a few years, or knowing me, maybe i inserted this on our 'time capsule' in our hideout, and you found it on 2020 or something crazy, haha, anyways, you should know that at whatever age, even if we grow white hair, or have wrinkles, you will always be watching netflix with me, we will still makeout, oh, and, i promise i won't force you to watch crime investigation with me, whatever you do,  I'll still be here, waiting for you, searching for you, and I love you.
xx, shawn.

//

i played the tape on an old, rusty cassette player, which was produced months before the letter, and i closed my eyes, as i listened to Shawn's angelic voice.

"hailey! i wrote a song for you! it's called tenerife sea (ik it's ed shsshshshhshshs), and it is to express how i love you, how cuddly you are, and i llooove you! here we go,

you look so wonderful in that dress....

this song is to remind you that you are perfect in everyday and i would love you forever, we can cuddle, or kiss each other on ferris wheels, or we can watch -I mean you can force me to watch, teen wolf with you, i can love you forever without you even noticing it," "I LOVE YOUUU,"

by now, tears were streaming down my face, and i didn't care how much, because he promised me basically everything I would ask for, and i let him go, i fucking let him go, and everything is now fucked up, just because of me, because of my stupidity.

all because of me.

and as i thought these excruciatingly dark thoughts, i found my self on throwing everything back, and thinking, here's how everything went........