Little Do You Know. (Phan)

Beginning.

Phil POV

I don't know I am so confused right now. Well I will tell you why I am confused. So after Dan and I met Jake. Let's just say that I started talking to Jake to be polite to be honest I wanted a nice night with Dan. Jake started talking to me more and I found him very nice. He was my hight. Had blond hair and blue eyes. He was the opposite of Dan. Jake was alright but Dan was special. Nothing and no one can compete with Dan. But if felt nice you know to talk to someone new that likes you. We started walking and we talked more Jake started flirting with me and I liked it. But do you know why I liked it ? I liked it because I missed Dan. I missed how we used to be like this all the time. We used to be attached to each other. You can ask anyone that knows us. So I just continued with Jake. To try and forget those memories. It wasn't fair on Dan. I forgave him I know. But I still need to start trusting him and I am scared. I have feelings. I love him. But I don't want this to crash. I know that I should be telling him these things and I will but not tonight.

So I just flirted with Jake I sometimes looked at Dan to see what he was doing. It was a habit. I looked and he looked like he was sad. Why was he sad? I mean he kept looking at the table and staring at it. I started to talk to him a little but he was cutting short. Chris and PJ then started looking at Dan they knew something was up with him too. I mean was I doing something wrong?. Aren't we friends? Was he feeling like this maybe because of Jake? I don't know what's going through his head. I don't like seeing him sad. I want that happy Dan that I saw on the plane again. I decided to give him some space and maybe stop talking to him. Maybe he didn't feel like talking. I felt guilty like I was doing something bad. I mean I know I have planned to be with Dan all the time here. But what am I supposed to say to Jake I didn't want to be rude. To be honest I wished I was next to Dan right now. Whispering to him something I wanted only him to know. Making jokes with him. Playing with our feet under the table. We used to do that a lot. I wanted to be close to him but there was Jake. We started eating and I looked to see what Dan was doing again. He was just playing with his food and not really eating. I needed to talk to him and it needed to be soon. I wanted to see whats going in his head. So then Jake said something funny and I laughed then just excused himself to the bathroom. He looked like he was about to cry. I say him running to the bathroom. I was going to get up to go after him to see what it wrong.

But Chris stopped me and said that it wouldn't be a good idea for me to go right now. So I stayed there feeling like torture I wanted to be there to see while he was crying. I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him that it's going to be fine. But instead Chris went to see. I started thinking about today I think that I know why Dan is upset. I think that it's because of Jake. Why didn't I tell Jake to get up so Dan could sit next to me? I mean I would have preferred that but I mean I didn't want to be rude. Why did I ignore him on the walk to here? Because I liked the attention. I wanted that from Dan but I think I am scared that that is keeping us from doing anything. I mean Dan is someone that I would't even bear it if I lost him. So I was being very careful. But tonight I made a mistake and I know it. I should have gave Dan a chance. And then maybe we would know where we could go from here. I ruined tonight for him. It was the first night here it is already a disaster.

I just couldn't stand sitting there anymore. I had to go see the facts myself. I needed to go see Dan. I got to the bathroom but I didn't go in immediately I stayed there because I heard Chris and Dan talk I heard them say

"Why don't you tell Phil those things that you just said to me right now?" Chris told Dan

What did he want to tell me? I was so confused. Why didn't he come to me first. It sounded like Dan was crying.Then I heard him say "Because it is to late. He needs time. That's what he will just tell me." how does he know what I will tell him if doesn't talk to me. What time do I need? And what is to late? I had so many questions I just had to go in there so I opened the door. I first looked at Dam oh my god his eyes where bright red from all of the crying. He was crying that was official. Why didn't he come to me and talk to me I was getting mad at this. But instead I asked him if he's okay. And he just told me "yeah totally" and went out of the door he didn't even look at me. He just walked past me. Why was he being so cold. I looked at Chris to maybe get some answers.