Mute

Chapter 1

    "Are you ready?"

   I smiled and slowly sat down in the seat, the rickety springs creaking under my weight. Madison, (Maddie for short) my neighbor and only friend, laughed and kicked her heels. We were on the Tilt A' Whirl, one of Richmore County Fair's best rides ever. Or so they said. I glanced down at the rusty bench uncertainly. Would this thing even hold our weight once it got going? Maddie saw my doubtful look and laughed.

   "Oh, don't worry, Hailey," she grinned, swinging her legs. "Hundreds of people have ridden this ride and gotten off ok." 

     I raised an eyebrow, doubtful. 

     "Well..." she grimaced and cocked her head to the side, "My friend Joe puked as soon as he got off the ride, but besides that..."

  Oh great. If I didn't die on this ride, I'd throw up at the end. Lovely. I shifted in my seat and sighed. But Maddie had been wanting me to try this ride for ages. And I always felt like such a drag, never wanting to do the crazy things she wanted to do, so finally I'd relented, if only to get her to stop bugging me about it.

   The Tilt A' Whirl operator, a dirty, greasy-haired man with drooping eyes, obviously bored out of his mind, came along the line- checking all the passengers to make sure their seat belts were fastened tight. He stopped at Maddie and me and tugged at my seat belt with fat fingers. "Hey. Tighten your belt." 

     I ignored him. My belt was already as cinched in as it could be on my bulging stomach. Maddie had coaxed me into "sampling" all the fair food, which resulted in me being choked to the gills with funnel cakes, fried Oreos, and corndogs. If I'd eaten anything more I might have puked before the ride even started.

   "Tighten your belt!" The man was getting more insistent. He turned to Maddie. "Why won't she say anything?"

    "She's deaf," Maddie explained quietly. The same lie I'd made up that she believed and had told people over and over again.

    "Oh." The man paused, and looked me up and down like he was seeing a different person, like I was contagious with the flu or something. "Oh," he said again, then stepped away. Thank goodness he was gone.

   Maddie squeezed my arm sympathetically. "You ok, Hailey?" I smiled at her. At least one person understood. That's why I hated going to any parties or social activities. People would chat with me, trying to stir up conversation. And then someone would say it. They'd just look at the poor person trying to communicate with me and say, "Oh, she's deaf." And then the person would say "Oh," and step away from me like I had a fatal disease. Thank goodness for spunky, outgoing Maddie. Funny, actually, that she even liked to hang out with me. She was the life of the party, a social climber, someone that had dozens of friends wanting to hang out with her. But even though I never talked to her, the two of us had bonded like glue the first time we met.  And really, Maddie didn't need a friend that talked. She could carry a conversation single-handedly. I smiled to myself, thinking of the first time we'd met. She'd said hi, I'd nodded, and she'd talked nonstop after that. Apparently she didn't mind that I didn't talk. I guess she liked someone who was content to just listen. Even though she thought I couldn't hear her. Well, she thought that I was learning to read lips- which was why I reacted to some of the stuff she said. That's why whenever she would confide any really deep stuff, she turned her head away so I couldn't hear... and judge. If only she knew that I really could hear her. I was the only one she really spilled her heart out to. And that was only because she thought I couldn't hear her. All of her problems she'd confided in me. I'd heard about all her crushes, how frustrated she was at her mom for not letting her get a phone. How mad she was that some jock had broken up with her at prom, and how she secretly wished she could just run away from home. All the girls she pretended to be friends with when she really didn't give a crap about them. If she knew that I'd heard and remembered everything she'd said, she would be mortified.

   The operator punched a few buttons and was about to start the ride when three teens, two girls and one guy, squeezed through the gate, waving yellow tickets. "Hey, can we get on?"

   My heart sank to the pit of my stomach as I recognized Josh, cool and casual as always, rocking a simple plaid shirt with the sleeves rolled up. The operator grunted and nodded, and the three climbed on, strapping themselves into seats right next to us. I squirmed, uncomfortable. Josh, the person I'd dreamed about for years, was sitting only two spots away from me, sandwiched between those two girls. All I'd have to do was say something and he'd look over and notice me. But, of course, I couldn't. It was like my mouth was glued shut. 

    Maddie elbowed me excitedly. "It's Josh!!" she hissed in a stage-whisper, grinning ear to ear. I grimaced. Let's hope she doesn't do anything embarrassing. She's had a crush on Josh for forever, even though she's supposed to be dating some stuck-up boy named Brandon. But even though she pretends like she's in love when she's around him, she told me the only reason she was dating him was because he's on the football team. 

     She never knew about that day that Josh had rescued me from that bully. I guess it was a small thing, not like Josh and I had really connected, but it had always stayed in my memory. No one else had ever stood up for me like that. All the other boys just avoided me like I had the plague or something. I risked taking a peek over at him. Still talking. Geez, he was so cute. Not like it mattered. His personality was the thing I was in love with. But still... A secret smile crept onto my face as I watched him talking, soaking in his perfect jawline, his big beautiful eyes. I still couldn't figure out what color they were; sometimes blue, sometimes green, always flecked with hints of gold and brown. I imagined him turning to me, giving me a smile or even a flirty wink like I've seen other boys at my school doing to girls.

    But, as usual, nothing. I might as well have been invisible.

     I sighed, and turned my attention to the girls he was with, wondering if he was dating one of them.

      Sheesh though, those girls.

   They wore heavy makeup, totally contoured and bronzed and liplined and fake, with tight leggings and plunging necklines, like they wanted to flaunt their bodies for all the world to see. They were beautiful, but somehow it came as a shock to me to see Josh with those kind of girls. He always struck me as someone who liked natural beauty. I watched them, jealous, as they laughed and talked with Josh. The blonde playfully ran her fingers through his thick hair, and I squirmed. If only they knew how many times I'd fantasized doing that. Who were they, anyway? I'd never seen them at school. Then again, I stayed by myself during school hours, and normally bolted for the door as soon as it was over.

   Maddie read my mind, and said quietly, "The blonde's Ali Beecher, and the brown-haired girl's Nell Stowe." I heard just a hint of jealousy in her tone when she said "Ali Beecher". I guess Ali was the one Josh liked better or something.

   I turned back to the girls. After watching them for a bit, I noticed that the tall blonde girl was subtly flirting with Josh, while the shorter brown-haired girl didn't at all. Hmm, the blonde one must have already laid dibs on him. It didn't surprise me. I mean, Josh was Mr. Popular. Who could blame the girls for flirting with him. What surprised me was that he was letting them flirt with him, and even flirting back a little. I thought he was better than that!

   I sighed to myself. Maybe my idea of him had gotten rose-colored over the months.

   The ride suddenly creaked and groaned, snapping me out of my thoughts. Maddie squealed excitedly and grabbed my hand. "It's starting!" I wrapped my fingers around my seat belt and held on tight as we rose higher and higher, my legs dangling in the air, the people below getting smaller and smaller. No, no, no, get me off, get me off, get me off. As the ride started, swinging us slowly into the air, Josh and his girl friends still kept on chatting. I sneaked a glance over at them. Josh couldn't possibly like that blonde girl, could he? Stop it, Hailey! I scolded myself. Now I was getting as bad as Maddie.

   The ride lifted us high into the air and stopped, our feet dangling. I hadn't realized how high it was until I was actually on it. The people below us looked as small as action figures. I screwed my eyes shut and gripped my seatbelt tighter. Aghhhhh.

   Whoosh. We were flying down, down, down, straight towards the pavement below. My hair whipped straight up, and Maddie screamed, arms in the air, "YEAH!!!" I felt the fresh-squeezed lemonade inside me threatening to come up. No, I wasn't going to puke!!!