Wires

Fairy Tales

"Hope-" I held my hand up. 

"Jackson, don't. Just...don't." I could finally move and I turned away. I was glad I couldn't cry. I made a move for the door but he stopped me. 

"Stop." He immobilized me. Suddenly, I had a panic attack. This brought on memories of Jeff Cowry...he used to immobilize me before he...no. I had to move on. But,I couldn't help panicking. It scared me to think about. Oh yay...a robot with anxiety. This was so bizarre...I wanted to run and yell and scream, but I couldn't move. Couldn't do anything. I realized something. I was shorter. They had given me a new body? Maybe. I was mentally screaming. 

"Please don't go." But I was a flight risk.

So, each day, I was left at home, immobilized. Each time I heard those 4 letters, stop, my mind went off and memories flooded into me. It scared me. Jackson stayed away most of the time and it broke my heart. But, he had never loved me. I knew that. I knew it. My main purpose now was sitting and doing nothing while I freaked out about my immobilization. Every time I heard anything related to murder or killing or death, I was overcome by guilt. I had killed 142 people in the ten years I was used, kidnapped over 100, and spied on 47. Over 289 people affected by me. It was hard to think about, and scary. 

Asher, Jackson's son, was watching me today. I sat on the couch, staring at nothing. It had been a month since I came back. 

"Hey, I have to go to the store. I'll have to immobilize you." My metal joints locked tight as I tensed. "Hey, what's wrong?" I shook my head

"I-I-I'm f-fine..." I stuttered. He came into my line of sight. 

"No you're not."He looked into my eyes. "Tell me." I shook my head

"Just memories." I turned away.

"Why don't you come with me? It's not that big of a deal. I doubt you'll try to run now." This brought a whole new concern to my mind

"Jeff Cowry? What about him? Where is he?" I asked. This was all I could think of. 

"Hiding out. Marco has been trying to find him so he went underground." That didn't help. He could be anywhere. Anywhere. Waiting for me.

"What did he do to you that scares you so much?" Asher asked. I shook my head

"Besides forcing me to kill people? A lot." I turned away and sat on the bed. 

"You don't have to tell me. I understand if it's painful." He sat next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. There was silence

"I was. No clue about life or anything else." I sighed. "No clue." 

"It's hard being an AI isn't it?" How could he know?

"I guess it's hard for humans to understand." I stood up. 

"Human? Really?" He grabbed my arm and turned me to face him. I heard a voice in my head.

"Wireless communication capabilities. You need to learn how to tell who your kind is." I ripped my arm from his grip. 

"But Jackson's your dad..." 

"My mom's AI too, and my sister. Made, not born." 

"Why would he..."

"Your guess is as as good as mine. Just as good as mine." He looked at me and sighed.

"Yeah, I guess. He was always very caring. I guess after I left he needed a new charity case." Asher looked at me. 

"Charity case? He loves her!"

"Love? How can he love a pile of metal? He sure didn't love me, and I didn't have the capacity to love him. Love doesn't exist. We feel a connection to others, but true love only exists in fairy tales." I looked away. "True love is an unachievable goal. An ideal that humans concocted in their heads. It doesn't...exist." my voice was choked but I lacked the ability to cry. 

"If you keep thinking like that you'll never find love." He put a hand on my shoulder,  but I shoved him away. 

"I wasn't meant to find love! I was meant to kill! I'm a machine, I wasn't raised like a human like you were. I just...I just woke up with the sudden ability to feel. So now I just want to be done. Jeff used to...do so many things to me. But I couldn't care. It didn't scare me then. Now, it haunts me constantly. I am constantly reminded every single day of my fake life." I sighed. "So no, I'll never find love. But I don't want to. I don't want anything. I just want the darkness I had for ten years. That was my kind of peace." 

"Your kind of peace? That's death! That's not peace!" He grabbed my shoulders.

"Did...did they ever tell you why I was made sentient?" I asked, my voice choked.

"No." 

"I was meant to be a vessel for another girl's conciousness. A dead girl was supposed to come to life in me. My life was never meant to be my own. I was meant to be a replacement for Marco's daughter."

"I wish you would smile. You're so beautiful, I wish you would smile." I shook my head. 

"I can't remember how." I turned away and shook my head. "I've never been happy enough to smile and remember it." I sighed. "Never that happy."

"You can be." Asher said

"Optimism is for those who believe in fairy tales." I whispered.

"This isn't a fairy tale you're right, but the idea of someone caring about you that deeply is a reason to hold on." He sighed. "Its a reason to care." He shook his head. "I'm talking to a stone wall."  He turned away and walked out, locking the door behind him. I realised something. He didn't freeze me. He knew it scared me and he cared. Someone cared about my feelings?