The Fake Boyfriend (Punk! Harry) (Larry Stylinson)

"Why Are You Here?"

I was walking down the street, minding my own business and buying some shampoo, when I spotted him. My ex boyfriend Liam, with his arm around some blonde. When Liam saw me, our eyes locked for five long seconds before a big grin broke out across his face. He began walking towards us and I was frozen in place. My mind told me to run and forget I saw his beautiful face, but my heart glued my feet to the ground, and before I knew it, it was too late.

"Hey Lou!" He hugged me and the blonde gave me a big smile. He was kind of cute in a way, and he looked to be short, just like me."How are you doing?"

I hugged him back and felt my heart break when he pulled away again. "I'm doing good." That was an absolute lie. I didn't so much but watch Doctor Who and Once Upon A Time on Netflix, and occasionally write in my diary like the fag I was.

"This is Niall, my boyfriend." He waved towards the blonde, who gave me a friendly wave. "Today's his birthday and we just had to go out. Why are you here?" I wished him Happy Birthday with a fake smile as I remembered the times Liam would take me out to celebrate my birthday.

My brain started buzzing with mean and weird thoughts. I couldn't admit that after five months I was still single and that my heart still yearned for him. I just couldn't. That would be so sad and pathetic and my mouth started moving before my brain did.

"I'm buying some shampoo for my boyfriend. Today's not his birthday but he's a drama queen." I faked a laugh that must have sounded real because Liam and Niall both laughed. "He's tall and handsome and is just an amazing person all around." Little did they know that I was actually describing Liam. 

Liam's grin grew. "I'd love to meet him. Do you think that this Saturday we could all go to the movies or something?" Oh God.  Oh no. Come on Louis, say no. Say that you're busy and that your boyfriend and you are planning to go somewhere. Come on, SAY NO. 

"Sure." I said, closing my eyes for a brief second. I would regret this later, I'm sure of it. "We could definitely do that."

"Well we'll talk to you later." He said, and I almost felt like he was dismissing me but I bit my tongue, smiling at him as he and Niall walked down the street, chatting happily among themselves.

Oh how I was massively screwed.

I was such a pathetic human as I sat on my red, plush couch, looking around on some crappy website about hiring boyfriends that my friend Eleanor had suggested. We had known each other since our sophomore year of college. Right now she was visiting her home in Cheshire because her grandmother was sick, and I missed her more than anything. As we were talking on the phone about the website, she had said one name that stuck with me, a guy named "Harry Styles." He was supposedly amazing at what he did, and he never left a client unhappy. She didn't answer my question about what reason she had needed him for.

"I am out of my mind." I muttered as I sent him an e-mail and my address offering $200. I didn't know what amount would suffice but I was sure that if that was too little, I could offer him something higher. My family is sort of super rich, so I wasn't really worried about all that junk. Whoa, that sounds super snobbish. 

After staring at my computer screen for two whole hours waiting for a reply, sipping a glass of red wine, he finally did, with a short 'Okay, I'll be there on Saturday at noon.' I had expected something more but I guess he was used to doing this sort of thing. I looked around my messy apartment and sighed with a smile and a laugh.

Oh God, I have to get this place cleaned up.

I sat perfectly still on my couch when Saturday came, awaiting the arrival of Harry Styles. I liked his name, I really did. I sort of pictured what he would look and be like. I imagine him being tall and handsome, well mannered, kind, and patient. A banging on the door knocked me out of my thoughts and I rushed over to it, throwing it open.

Before me stood the opposite of what I expected Harry Styles to be. He was tall and handsome, but his hair had purple and blue highlights, and his arms were covered in tattoos. He has this smirk on his face that basically said "I'm better than you." He looked me up and down and sighed, rolling his eyes and face palming. He wore all black, but what stood out most to me was the long black trench coat that reached his knees.

"You're a guy. Of course you're a guy." He glared at me. "A short one at that. You said the movies at 3:00 right?"

"Yes." I said. "My name is-"

He raised a hand to cut me off. "Do me a favor and don't speak because your voice annoys me, and your name is Lewis. You said so in that lengthy e-mail. Thanks for that. I just love to read."

"You don't have to be rude." I snapped. "Are you Harry Styles?"

"No, I'm the tooth fairy." He said in a bored tone.

"You certainly do have the hair of a fairy."

"Just like you have the voice of one." He retorted. "Why are we doing this again? Who's this for?"

"Liam." I said. "My ex. He's dating this new Irish guy named Niall and he's perfect and I panicked and said I had a boyfriend and now-"

"Shut up." He said viciously. "I said not to talk because you're annoying, and you're stupid and pathetic and a waste of space." My mouth dropped and I swung my hand at him with the intention of smacking him to next week, but he caught my hand. His grip tightened to the point of pain and I winced, which he ignored. "I wouldn't try that again if I were you, princess." My skin tingled at the nickname. "Fortunately, you're an an annoying, stupid and pathetic waste of space with money, and that's the only reason I'm standing here right now you worthless little shit-"

I slapped him with my other hand and he let out a low hiss of pain. He looked at me and opened his mouth to say something but it was me who raised a hand to cut him off this time. I yanked my other hand out of his grip.

"Listen here." I said. "You are not going to stand here and insult me while I'm paying you to simply sit in the theaters for a couple hours and say some nice words about me to my ex."

"There's nothing nice to comment on." He said with malice in his tone. "And the next time you slap me ever, you're gonna regret it, princess."

I went over to the coat rack to grab my beige coat. "Let's head out then."

I could tell that this was all gonna go down the drain but on the bright side....he's cuter than Niall.