19 October 2020

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/alcohol/

Phil,

I did it again.

I drank.

I'm crying.

It's been 11 years since we met. You're not here in my life still. I've tried for a year to get you back in my life, but all I've done is nothing. I can't do anything besides sit here and wait for you.

Phil, I really fucking miss you. You were the sunshine in my sky. I know I would never admit that to you face-to-face, but it's true. Bloody hell, it's so fucking true. You have no idea how much I mean that.

I didn't feel the best before we met, but then you came along. You taught me how to love life, so I did. You made me feel alive. The sad thing is, drinking makes me feel partially alive now. And I'm not really loving life.

Please give me another chance, Phil.

From,
Dan Howell

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