Internet Support Group

Fixing Mistakes

*Phil's POV*
Still trembling about my email, I went to go make a cup of tea to calm my nerves.

My phone rang just as the kettle went off. I pulled it off the stove and picked up the phone.

Hello?

Phil? It's me. I'm so sorry, I messed up. I left the boy I loved. I left the boy who loved me.

Dan, stop

No, I need to say this Phil. I choose the wrong person to love. I choose a girl, when I wanted a boy. I wanted you Phil. And now I don't deserve you. I can never deserve you. I chose a girl who made me give up my best friend, how could I love that? And the 50 things you love about me? Here's 50 I love about you:

50. How much One Direction loves you
49. Your too black for this world hair
48. How well you smash mirrors
47.How you were the king of Badger Simulator
46. How amazing you are at Innuendo Bingo 
45. How you wear colors and I wear black
44. Your evil twin
43. How much you love the tree
42. That you bought me drinks in America
41. Your sleepwalking, occasionally
40. Your perfectness on-air
39. Your lack of artistic ability
38. You love Delia Smith as much as me
37. How much you loved your plasma ball
36. Your shortness
35. Your amazingness at 5 nights
34. How it was an idea of perfect night with takeout and anime
33. Phil the lion is the cutest thing I've ever seen
32. How you let me comfort you on the roller coaster 
31. You would always play Mario Cart with me even though you knew you'd lose
30. How you let me hold you when you had man flu
29. The tightness of your jeans
28. Your love for cheese
27. Your scream
26. How good you looked with a dragon tattoo
25. How creative you are when it comes to new ideas for videos
24. When you met that girl and got her to stop cutting because you get it
23. Your love for your duvet
22. That you're such an amazing cook
21. Your lack of swearing
20. You deal with my swearing
19. Your obsession with Edward Cullen
18. How you accept the Phandom just the way they are
17. You would always hold on tighter whenever you could
16.You accept my sleeping habits
15. You told me you were ok with me leaving
14. Your love for Christmas
13. Your obsession with cat whiskers, and how cute you look with them
12. You NEVER stopped caring
11. You understand my favorite position
10. You act so innocent but your innuendoes are worse than mine  
9. How you eat ice cream even though it upsets your stomach so I can hold you when it hurts
8. You were the one who started my YouTube career
7.  You have helped my Existential Crisis when no one else would 
6. You know what I've dealt with
5. You get that I like my fans more than my family
4. You're ok with me corrupting you
3. How your tongue sticks out of your mouth when you laugh
2. You were the first to tell me congrats on 1,2,3,4,5 million and all the ones in between
And finally the last reason I love you,
1. Is that you love a mess like me

This is why I love you Phil and so many more, but I don't deserve even the idea of you. I'm sobbing and I can't stop and the only thing I want is to be in your arms!

Now I was crying, shit. I told myself to be stronger. Gaining strength I said,

Dan? Do you mean that, because you left me in the dust? You left me for a girl you had only known for a year. What happened to our 5 year friendship? What happened Dan?

See, this is why I don't deserve you. I left you. I really did it and why? to be with a girl I thought I loved. I left the one person who made me feel my best. But I broke up Dan and Phil. Wasn't I the one who said it's Dan and Phil not Dan or Phil. I contradicted myself in the worst way, so Phil I'm so sorry.

Dan, I want to forgive you I do but what happens then? We just go happily off into the sunset? Dan what happens next?

I don't know Phil. I don't know but all I know is that I want you and no one else. Can we figure it out along the way?

Dan, maybe we can?