Circuits & Veins

Circuits & Veins- Chapter 4

        Of course, it wasn't entirely fair for me to accuse Ai of all those things. It wasn't fair at all. If I hadn't been born with a bad heart, I wouldn't be feeling this pain; no, this wasn't his fault at all. What's more, blaming him wasn't right; it was nothing more than my sad attempt at blaming someone, anyone else- anyone other than myself.

        "I'm not gonna put up with this anymore. Do you understand me!?" I yelled, stepping forward in his direction. I wanted him to yell back. I wanted him to shove me forcefully down on to the ground, I wanted him to hit me, I wanted him to shout and scream and cry; I wanted something, anything from him! All I wanted was for him to acknowledge me! As an idol- no, as a person!

        "Are you even listening to me!?" I screamed, grabbing him aggressively by the collar. He responded by looking at me as if he were looking at a speck of dust- with a bitter indifference that shook me to the very core.

        "I'm sick of it! Quit treating me like I don't matter! Like I'm insignificant, or just some frickin' test subject! Quit treating me like I'm NOTHING!" My heart pounded out of my chest, but I was so angry that I didn't even notice the pain. My hands were trembling like a tiny leaf caught up in a windstorm and I could barely breathe, but it all seemed like no more than a blur- the entirety of my attention was directed towards his dead eyes. Despite their almost otherworldly blue hue, it was like staring into pebbles- somehow, even during direct eye contact, it was like he wasn't looking at me. Dizziness slowly began to wash over my consciousness, threatening to pull me under, but I fought it off with all my might.

        "Look at me!" I breathed, gripping his collar in desperation as tightly as I could despite my shaking hands.

"...LOOK AT ME!!!" As the last scream escaped from my lips, my vision suddenly began to cloud. The large blue eyes I was dwelling on a moment earlier started to feel farther and farther away, and I realized that it was because I was falling backwards, almost as if in slow motion. My body had finally reached it's limit, and I found myself no longer able to fight off the overwhelming dizziness.

"This can't... be happening." The thought echoed in my head like a ripple in a pond.

The last thing I saw was the figure of my upperclassman hovering over me before the dark sky in my vision dissolved into a solid shade of black.

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        "Tokiya, look, he's waking up!"

        ...Huh? Who's voice is that? What time is it? Where am I?

        "Syo-Kun! Can you hear me!?" The same voice.

         "Otoya, he's still waking up. Speak quietly."

        Otoya? So, that's whose voice I heard a moment ago. But to whom did the second voice belong?

       With a little effort, I was able to fully pry open my eyes. As my vision slowly came into focus, it settled on the sight of two figures looming over me- one with bright red hair, and a slightly taller one with black hair standing beside it. They were my friends and fellow bandmates, Otoya Ittoki and Tokiya Ichinose.

"Oto...ya? Is that you?" I mumbled, rubbing my head. There was a pretty large bump on it.

"Syo-Kun! You're finally up! Are you alright!?" he asked, grabbing my hand and peering into my eyes with a face full of concern.

        "Yeah... Where am I?" I asked, trying to sit up. I was in a bed... was this the school nurse's office?