Hetalia One-Shots

DenNor - Thief

"As a Danish man in his twenties I've visited the neighboring countries of Sweden, Norway, and Finland. As a young man in his twenties I've played around with a few men and woman in those countries. Everyone in Norway that I've been with say kjæreste, which is gender-nuetral and a very common thing to say in Norway, it means "Dearest". Alskade is Swedish for "my beloved one", and it works the same was as what the Norwegian people say, and then there are the Finnish people who say mulkvisti, which translate as "one I don't hate as much as others". 

I'm more attracted to the Norwegian people than anything else, mostly because Swedish people are known well for rock ballads and their language matches it, finnish people are known for death metal music and their language shows it. Norwegians have heavy death metal but yet have the sexiest accent, and the sweetest vocabulary. So I went back to Norway and was at the local store buying food for the house I had just bought, and I saw a man around my age putting plastic on a debit card and swiping it after looking around for a while.

After the man hurried out with three bags full of items I decided to follow him. When I came upon him a second time he was eating feverishly in an alley. "Uh, hey, you okay man?" I asked curiously as I rubbed the back of my head awkwardly.

"Leave me alone" the thick Norwegian accent through me off with it's harsh back tone. 

"I saw you use the credit card trick in the grocery store" I sat across from him on the other side of the alley with my long legs out stretched. 

"Who the hell cares?" His eyes met mine and they were a slate grey that held a painful glow.

"Obviously I do, I don't know why but I do, you're a stranger, anyways come to my house, let me get you some clean clothes, you can bathe and eat a proper meal." I rubbed the back of my head again and look to my car.

"You don't know me, I could be a mass murderer and you're just going to willingly get in a car with me and take me to your house?" He threw the wrapper of the deli wrap he was eating into the garbage behind him.

I'm a profiler, I profiled for the Danish government on several cases all over Scandinavia, and now I'm permanently placed in Norway. Herefore I know you're homeless, most likely a foster kid" Lukas snapped his eyes to me and he seemed to assess the situation. His mind was weighted heavily as he sorted throught the pro's and cons of going with me, or leaving me.

"Fine, I'll go" I stood up and opened the passenger side door which slumped into my car and slammed my door shut and I stood there surprised for a minute but shrugged it off and walked to my side of the car getting in quietly.

The drive to my new house was quiet, we exchanged a few words about ourselves such as our full name and I quickly learned his name is Lukas Bondevik and he was a foster kid, but something had happened and he got away.

The first night he stayed he was quiet, barely left the guest room, and it had gotten to the point that he'd just slip out of the window, but when I opened the door for his room.I saw he was asleep on the bed snoring quietly and that's when I decided I would let him stay as long as he wants, as ling as he looks for a job or starts college or something. And he did, the next morning.he said he would look for colleges and he even asked for my help which lead to him trusting me as a friend, and him trusting my friends. I'm still the only one allowed to make him coffee, not Berwald, not Tino, not Vlad, and definitely not Arthur, just me.

And that kid, is how I met your mother"

Emil stared at me blankly. "Matthias, lukas is definitely the dad, you're the mom"