Sleeping With The Light On (Sequel to The Irreversible Reaction)

The loss of one pain gains another

Well Let's just say the past week has been a nightmare. I was back home with Nathan fussing all over me like always. I was told that I had been lucky with bruses and a few broken bones. Well this means a few weeks off work. Brilliant. Today was the dreaded day. I just hoped they would actually do their job this time and keep him behind bars but even I think prision is to good for him. I was sat outside the court room with Nathan next to me. Everyone from the stables came down to see Steve get put behind bars. 

We were soon ushered into the court room and I noticed the same Judge from the last time so I just hoped she would put him back behind bars. We got told to sit down and it then commenced. The leanthy process of questions being bounced around the room like pinballs. I kept telling Nathan that I didn't want to go near him just to answer a bunch of questions. Luckly the police let me film what happened so this was a little less emotional for me. 

The Judge started the speech, "Well look who it is? I didn't expect to see you back but look what you have gone and done. Why would you break out? Why would you hurt her? She wanted you out of her life and she moved on." The judge gave him a look and started the precedings. It was going to be a very long day but it needed to be done. I never want him near me again. I just wished he had left me alone, I just wished he stayed in that place and never bothered me because now I was scared. I hated being in the same room as him. I'm just glad he could hopefully be back behind bars.

The questions were still being flung backwards and forwards. The lies were falling out of his moth like a waterfall and when it came to my video it became too much. I couldn't take it anymore as the memories ran throgh my head.

"Nathan" I looked towards him as he looked back, his sparkling green eyes looking back into mine, the usual smiling eyes were looking like he was in pain, just to hear the way I was treated.

"Yeah" He replied back as a tear came from my eye. He brought his hand gently up to the tear and whiped it away.

"I can't do this. I'm sorry" I whispered back as I got up and left. Why did I let Nathan be dragged into my life. What was the point in all of this? He has broken out once, what would stop him doing it again? I wasn't staying to hear the ending. I just walked to the stables. My get away place. I got out of the clothes that made me feel like some sort of office person and got into the clothes that made me, well me. My riding things. I tacked Bex up and eaded out. She really didn't look well at all. It didn't take long for me to bring her back to the stables and call the vet out.

In a matter of moments he was looking her over. His facial expression was enough to say it. "I'm so sorry Aj, Bex is very ill and she will not improve" I broke down. Bex was the one thing I had left of my mum and now I was going to loose her. What would I do now?

The vet went on and told me what the best thing was for her. This meant one thing, I had to put her down. This was the hardest decision anyone had to make but it was the best for her. It wasn't fair on her to suffur. I couldn't let her. She was the most amazing friend anyone could have had. Having to do that was so hard. The vet went to get the drug as said my goodbye to her.

Nathan walked up and saw me. I couldn't even tell him, the vet had to. This was the hardest day for me. By sorting one pain out in my life to gainging another from this.

"Bex, you are amazing. If I didn't have you then I would have given up fighting. It was us against the world and it always will be. It's just you and me. Mum will look after you now but no matter what I will never forget you. Our bond is so strong no one will ever break it. I love you Bex." She went and layed herself on the floor as I crouched down stroking her neck. She was slowly slipping away from me. Everything we did together was running through my mind as she slowly slipped into a never ending sleep. I didn't knw what she had but I didn't want to know. Everyone from the stables crowded round this one stable. Tears in everyone's eyes as they realised what was happening. Bex was leaving us. The most friendly horse in this place was going to another place, a place that was safe and where she would not be hurt. As night drew in, she took her last breth. I broke down. Tears falling down not just my face but everyone. Nathan was next to me crying his eyes out. He learned to ride on Bex. Infact a lot of people did. We would never find another horse like Bex.

me and Nathan couldn't face watching them moving her out of her warm stable so we went to Sykes. He was just as down in the dumps as we were. Amber said that Billie Jo was the same. They were hurting like we were. They were all buddies so it hurt them too. I couldn't face being here right now so me and Nath headed home. He told me that Steve was never going to see the light of day again and the judge understood why I left. It had been one of those days I would never forget. I had lost something so close to me that it could never be replaced. My life evolved around Bex and to not have her here now was the most heart breaking thing ever. What was I meant to do now?

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Well that is another chapter through. I was crying writing this chapter