The Only Ugly Thing About This Breakup is Me

3

Jasmine was already there when we got to the front doors. The parking lot was almost empty, and the buses were already turning into the main road. I was just glad that the lightning seemed to stop flashing now. They terrified me the most.

"You guys ready to--? Jasmine's phone interruted her. "Wait, hang on." She said as she checked her phone and smiled. "Hello, Chase?"

Jasper and I looked at each other and gave each other a knowing smile. Ah, Chase the Charmer. Jasmine's 'friend' from another school on the other side of town. Chase and Jasmine obviously liked each other a whole lot, but they were both just too shy to admit it. The three of us moved out of the way of the doors.

"I'm fine, Chase! Are you?.... Yeah, we... Oh, you're on your way home? Okay, drive safe, all right? I still want to see you tomorrow.... No, silly! Jasper brought his car... Yes... I'll tell him... I gotta go, we're leaving in a while... No, you call me..." She laughed and Jasper and I just rolled our eyes.

"Okay... bye.... I'll see you..." She giggled again. "Who ends the call?... You called me so you end it...."

Beside me, Jasper heaved a sigh. I bit my lip to keep from laughing but ending up coughing a bit. Jasmine looked at both of us and rolled her eyes.

"I'll end it for now... My brother and his girlfriend are rolling their eyes at me... They're so mean to me..." She said that last part in a baby voice. Then she smiled again, maybe because she heard Chase's laugh in the other line. "Okay, I'm really gonna hang up now... Bye!"

"Finally," Jasper and I both muttered as she put her phone in her pocket.

She just waved a dismissive hand. "Let's just go."

Jasper told us to wait in here while he ran to get the car. He said he'll park the car somehwere near the entrance of the school and then he'll come get us. I told him thanks and gave him my umbrella. 

"Don't miss me too much." I teased him.

He forced his laugh, which set me back a bit. He always genuinely laughed when I said that. Then he'd say "I already miss you," when he walked away.

But none of that today. He just forced that laugh and went out the front door.

"I wonder what's going on with him," Jasmine said, looking at me for answers. "He didn't sleep well last night. I thought it was his homework but then he said he didn't finish that one either."

I shrugged. "I tried asking, but I feel like he's been avoiding me."

Jasmine sighed. "Meh, he's probably just a little moody now that exams are around the corner."

I nodded my head in agreement to make myself feel better.

"Anyway," Jasmine said excitedly, as she bounced on her heels. "Are you and Jasper up for a double date somewhere in the near future?"

I rolled my eyes at her and smiled. "Did you just admit to liking Chase?"

"What? I never, uh, what?"

"Jasmine, be serious. Everyone knows you guys like each other."

"They do?"

"No, you drop the call. You drop it. Giggle giggle." I mimicked, trying to copy her voice.

Instead of getting upset, she just smiled. And then giggled.

"See!" I told her. "There it is."

"Oh whatever, Melissa!" She said nudging me with her elbow. "You are just like my brother when it comes to teasing me. You guys are like, perfect for each other."

I raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?"

"Yeah. Perfectly mean."

That was Jasmine always so dramatic.

"You're so dramatic," I told her, but I was only kidding. I liked Jasmine, even though she was a drama queen.

Her phone beeped and she had another call. She looked at the screen expectantly but her face fell and said "Oh, it's Jasper. Here answer it." She held it out for me.

"Hello?" I asked bringing it to my ear.

"Jas--- Hi Mellie." He said softly.

"Hey," I replied.

"Look, I'm a little ways off the front door, but the rain is really crazy and you're umbrella is tiny. Makes me wonder how you fit in it." He laughed but I didn't.

Another harmless comment, but I took it personally anyway. Man, I really should stop doing that.

"Wait, that sounded wrong." Jasper said. "I didn't mean it like that."

I shook my head, which was stupid because he couldn't see me. "No, yeah, I know."

Jasmine looked over at me and titled her head. I shook my head to tell her it was nothing.

"Anyway, I don't have another umbrella, so I'll pick you girls up one at a time, okay? Because probably only two people can fit in here and stay dry."

My throat felt dry. Those harmless comments sure were plenty today, I tell you. I wanted to slap myself; to tell myself to get a grip. He didn't mean it that way. Let it go!

"Okay," I told him, clearing my throat. "Yeah, we'll... we'll wait for you."

"Okay, I'll see you in a bit." He said, sighing. And then he dropped the call. None of that 'No, you drop the call' flirtation at all.

I was explaining to Jasmine what Jasper told me when he showed up at the front doors.

"Who's first?" He asked, shaking some of the rain from his shoes. He hardly even had raindrops on his jacket. What was he talking about? My umbrella wasn't that tiny.

"Me!" Jasmine called, turning around to give me a not so subtle wink.

Jasper just shrugged and gave me a smile. "I'll come back for you, okay, Mellie?

I nodded my head, feeling stupid with the butterflies that started to attack my stomach. They did that every time he called me Mellie.

"Don't miss her too much," Jasmine told him with yet another wink as they got ready to go outside.

He rolled his eyes and laughed but he met my gaze and also winked.

Okay, now, I'm confused.

When they were out of sight, I shifted my things and strategized how to hold my bag so that it wouldn't get wet. Jasper got back and reached out for my hand.

"Ready?" He asked me as I positioned my bag.

"Yeah," I told him, trying to smile.

I know it sounded stupid, but now I felt huge and having to share an umbrella with Jasper when I was huge meant either I was going to get pelted by raindrops or he was.

"Listen, about that thing on the phone."

"I know you didn't mean it that way," I told him. "It's okay... It's just me overreacting."

He frowned at me and reached for my bag. "You are not overreacting, Melissa. We just need to work on your confidence a bit more, okay?"

He gave me a soft smile again, and I felt like crying. I don't know why, but I did.

"Come on," He said as he held my bag against his chest.

Jasper told me to scoot over closer to him as we walked outside, and I couldn't help but feel self-conscious again. What if he thought I was huge? What if he could feel my fats underneath my jacket?

He gestured for me to come closer to him.

"Are you okay?" I asked him as we slowly walked to his car.

He just smiled and gave my temple a quick kiss. "We'll talk later, okay?"

I returned his smile, but it was like the puddles on the ground; a little watery and shallow.