Alone

The Boy

Now you know my pain. I have lost my parents and best friend all within a month or so. I have a right to be depressed. My counselor thinks otherwise.

"Jamie. Listen. You need to let go of the past. Things change, people leave. All for the better! To keep it spicy. Yeah. . .spicy." He became dazed, started staring out the window. Freak.

"Well, Mr. D, I got to go. I have a life and I don't need your hippie remarks to penetrate my ears. Bye." I stood and grabbed my bag, heading for the door.

"Spicy, Jamie. . .keep it groovy."

As I closed the door I muttered to myself "That freak! I swear he is drunk. Why do I even need to see him. I have classes to attend."

"Careful Stargazer. Someone might hear you."

Ugh! I turn around and see James standing there. He looks me up and down. Hopefully not impressed. . .no, the look on his face says he is attracted. Well crap. I don't know what is attractive about gray sweats being worn three days in a row with a nasty stain on the thigh and a really baggy, green hoodie. Ah well, you can't say I didn't try.

"You looking nice." He wears a smirk, like he thinks he is real witty. I hate him.

"Gee. Thanks. I was trying to scare an annoying brat away."

"Really? Who? I can help you out if you need it." The smirk disappears as though he actually cares about me. I know he doesn't. James is the biggest player in this school.

"Yes. You. You could help by leaving me alone!" I practically shout, but I don't. For me shouting is talking a little bit louder. It doesn't bother anyone. Normally.

He cowers. Maybe he does care. "Okay. I guess I-I'll be going then. See you around stargazer." As he turns, his shoulders slump forward ever so slightly. He hangs his head as he walks down the hall. I shrug and head towards my locker as the bell rings.

Krista bounds up to her locker right before I can get to mine. Ugh. This is the most popular girl in school. Cheer captain. She always blocks me from my locker. I wait a while for her to leave. She slams her locker shut when it is only me and her left in this wretched building. She looks me dead in the eye with a fake smile plastered on her face.

"Is there something I can help you with J?" She questions in her sing-song "I don't give a crap" voice.

"No. Just trying to get to my locker." I try to give her a warm smile, but I'm afraid it is not that good because she walks right up to me and points at me accusingly.

"I know what you are up to. You are trying to steal my boyfriend! Well let me tell you something, he will never like you. You are just a filthy little farm brat that only eats organic crap."

"Excuse me? Your boyfriend? You mean James? Ha! That guy is a dick. You can have him. And I am not a farm brat. Yes I eat organic, but that is because my Aunt only buys organic. I eat what she feeds me and I don't complain. I have manners!" I raise my voice, fuming. She is angry as well. I can tell. Her face turns bright red and she storms off.

I continue to my locker and grab my stuff required to head home. I hear the buses leave. "Well crap."

"Hey."

"What?"

"You need a ride?"

"I don't think Miss Krista would like that too much. She is kind of attached to her boyfriend, you know? I wouldn't want her to hate me or anything." I say, sarcasm dripping.

"I'm heading that way anyways. My family's farm is next to you-I mean-your Aunt Cassie's place. Come on, stargazer, let me take you . . . home?"

He is trying, Jamie. Give him a chance. NO! She will kill me! Maybe that is what you want? No. I want to live and be with Jason. Jason is gone! I know! "I know. Okay? I know." I didn't mean to say the last bit out loud, but what is done is done. I lean back on my locker and slide down to the floor. My head meets my knees and I cry. I know I should answer him, but I really just want to disappear. I hear him walk up to me. I assume he crouched down because when he speaks, he is right next to my ear.

"Stargazer? Jamie? D-do you want to talk about it?" He cautiously asks.

"Why do you call me stargazer, James?" I don't know why I asked it, but I did.

"Because whenever I enter my room at sunset, I look at the sky. The most beautiful stars shine then, in the pink and pale orange sky. I always look down at your Aunt's field, even before you moved in. I love how the grain catches the colors of the sky. It is art. But now I see you there. At first I didn't know your name, so I simply named you stargazer. One day I was talking about the new girl next-door and my father said that-your story, and said your name is Jamie. He asked me to be nice to you, but even before I met you, I knew we'd hit it off nicely." He chuckled. "I couldn't have been more wrong."

This story captured my attention. I looked at him, cautiously. He stared right at me. He had such big, loving eyes. They were green, like Aunt Cassie's, like mine. And those eyes bore straight into mine. His normally gelled brown hair looked like he had ran his hands through it while sharing this story. He was, dare I say it, attractive. He smiled at me and stood, offering me his hand. I looked at it and willed myself to take it. Once standing, he took my bag and I followed him out to his car.

It was a farm truck, but it was perfect. He held the door open for me until I was in and then he closed it. He went to the back and put our bags in there and promptly went to the driver's side and started the truck. It purred like a kitten. As he drove down the road to get home we sat in silence. But silence never bothered me. I stared out the window, looking at the passing trees, fields, and houses. Occasionally there would be a development, but it was never big, mostly townhouses.

He pulled into Aunt Cassie's driveway and up to the garage. I never really looked at the house before, but it caught my eye now. It was a gorgeous white house. I stared up at it in awe. I heard James chuckle beside me. "1764. It was the main house. A plantation owner lived here. When the family finally sold the property in 1854, the sold it in parts. There was a family who snatched up the main house as quick as they could. They had it until 1996, when your Aunt bought it. She restored it to its former glory. I know this because my dad has pictures of it before she came in and it was a mess. It is beautiful, isn't it."

"Yeah," I whispered, "it is." I turned to him and he was looking at me, smiling. "James?"

"What do you need, stargazer?"

"Can you drive me home everyday?" Wow. That sounded desperate. "I mean, so that I don't have to walk home, I miss the bus often."

He smiled real big. "Of course."

"James?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"No problem."

"No, really. Thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes to the beauty of the world. Thank you for driving me home. Thank you for treating me so well when I treated you so badly. But I'm scared." I seriously told him. Like I couldn't stress it any more than I was at that moment.

"What are you scared of? I'll always be here for you, if you need me. Why are you scared?" He was worried. The pain in his tone was easy to detect.

"The last person who treated me so well and said he'd always be there for me, well. . .he. . .um. . .he-he died. And I loved him so very much. Just don't do anything stupid that might kill you."

"Ha! Me? Stupid things! Ha!" He was joking around, but then he saw how serious my face was. "Of course. I promise I won't do anything that puts me in harms way."

"Thank you," I said as I climb out of the car and grabbed my bag from the back. When I got to the front door I turned and waved. He waved back. I opened the door and went inside. Closed it and ran as fast as I could to my bedroom and looked out the window. He was still there.