Tattoo [Rucas Short Story]

Letting Go

Why is it that when everything seems to finally be going well in your life, something always had to come and ruin it? That's the question Lucas was currently asking himself as he sat inside a jail cell in downtown New York City.

He'd done it - the thing that he's been trying to avoid since practically forever. He'd reverted back to his old ways. Tonight he became the person he hated to be and he couldn't stop it. It would be easy to blame it on the drinks or the stress he was under because of school, but he'd just be kidding himself. He knew exactly what had brought all this on. It was always the same thing, or rather the same person, making him act like someone he didn't want to be.

People had always assumed that Lucas had anger issues. And he did - he'd admitted it to himself and the people he cared the most about, including Riley. But he wasn't just born with these issues. It was something that had been building inside him for years as a kid that inevitably had to come to a boiling point. Like everyone else, Lucas' anger had a trigger and that trigger was his father.

No one would have ever suspected that his picture perfect family was actually crumbling behind closed doors. And it was all his fault. He wasn't who his father wanted him to be. He was a failure. It wasn't as if his dad had ever told him this outright, but he could read it in his eyes whenever Lucas did something that wasn't what he expected of him. Like getting expelled from seventh grade. Like wanting to become a vet instead of joining the army. He knew his father didn't approve of almost anything he did despite how hard he'd always try to please him.

That's what the problem was. The expectations his father puts on him just became too much for him to handle. Tonight was one of those times. His father had called him up a couple of minutes before he was going to pick Riley up for their date. Sargent Friar hardly ever called him, so he knew it was bad.

He hadn't been wrong. Not even one minute into the phone call, his father started reprimanding him about how his grades were dropping. You'd think with Lucas being in college his father would let him handle that. But even being out of the house didn't stop him from keeping his son on a short leash. He had a lot of connections in the city for being in the army for so many years. It was just a matter of time before someone blabbed about Lucas' grades.

The call had just gone downhill from there. His father interrogated him in every way possible to figure out the cause of his grade drop. When he got to the topic of girls, Lucas' muscles had stiffened.

"Is it a girl?" his father's deep voice had demanded from the other line.

Lucas' reply was immediate. "No, she has nothing to do with this."

"So there is a girl." His father threw back at him.

Lucas closed his eyes, silently cursing himself. He hadn't meant to let his father know about Riley.

"How many times do I have to remind you that girls are just a distraction, Lucas? They'll just keep you from achieving your goals."

"She's not a distraction, sir. I promise." He felt like a child again trying to convince his father that he wasn't making a mistake.

"If she wasn't, your grades wouldn't be suffering." His father was silent for a moment but Lucas knew he was still on the line. "I think you should stop seeing her."

Lucas' grip on his cell phone tightened. "I'm sorry, sir. But I can't do that."

"Can't or won't?"

He could tell his father was getting angrier, but he didn't care. No one was keeping him away from Riley. "Both. She means a lot to me, sir. I'm not gonna stop seeing her."