Ezra Lost

Chapter 5

5

EZRA'S VOICE did not answer Kanan's soft call. The tall Jedi stepped into the room and looked around. The moment he did, he could simply sense that his Padawan was not there.

But he had to look for clues. He just had to. Kanan began to mill around the area, careful to keep his back facing his friends. That way they couldn't see the tears rising up in his cyan eyes, despite how hard he tried to fight them. He turned on the lights when he found the switch. They barely cast any glow and they flickered. Kanan suspected they weren't even running on the main power grid anymore, and supposed that Ezra had managed to wire everything to a special (swiped) battery somewhere.

Clever, clever little Lothrat, Kanan thought with growing despair as he walked around briskly, looking around at everything, even the floor. He paused in front of a pair of stormtrooper helmets that were perched atop some old, parts-raided machinery. One of the helmets had obviously been nicked from a shadow stormtrooper. Kanan wondered briefly how the kid had managed to collect these without getting killed, then reflected again on his Padawan's slyness. He could outwit just about anybody.

Kanan also realized that Ezra might have traded with someone for the helmets - a risky business in itself, no matter the trader; they all had something up their sleeves, the Jedi had found - but Ezra had probably chosen the method of "direct trading."

Kanan reached out and slid two fingers across the ebony surface of the shadow stormtrooper helmet, then stared down at his fingertips. They were covered with a fine layer of dust.

For the second time that night, someone gently grasped Kanan's shoulder, and he sensed immediately that it was Hera. He grimaced in shame as he wiped the dust off his fingers with his light green tunic, then drew his arm across his eyes.

"Kanan," Hera murmured, "it would be best if we moved on to the docking bay. I was wrong. He isn't here."

"Don't feel bad," he told her gently, turning to face her. "It was a great idea to look. I'd never have even thought of it." He even mustered up a smile, but it didn't manage to reach his tourmaline gaze.

Hera tried to smile back, but there was concern and sadness written all over her green complexion. "Come on." She headed back out.

As Kanan slowly began to follow her, old memories suddenly rushed into his head. He could see it like it was all happening again.

Kanan was standing on the deserted control tower's balcony. The breeze toyed with his short brown ponytail as he gazed at a boy whose back was to him. The boy had raven hair,' and wore an orange jumper and dingy green backpack.

Kanan could tell the boy could sense him, even before the kid spoke.

"What's... the Force?"

"The Force is everywhere," Kanan replied, quietly but clearly. "It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together." He stared intently at the boy, who still wasn't looking at him - and Kanan knew that the kid could be so much more than just a street thief, stealing to survive. "And it's strong with you, Ezra."

Kanan opened his eyes and found that he had stopped again. He looked up. Sabine, Zeb, and Hera were all staring at him worriedly.

"K...Kanan?" Sabine ventured waveringly. "We really need to hurry if we're going to find Ezra before dawn."

Kanan nodded seriously, all too aware of the tears that had managed to escape onto his tan face. "R-Right." He hurried past them, feeling their gazes following him.

That day had been so important. It had been the day Ezra joined the Ghost crew to become Kanan's Padawan.

Kanan could not believe he had forgotten it.

They had been through so much together since then. They had disagreed and fought with one another, and struggled through some rough spots. But they had always stayed together, and with each other's help, they had both come so, so far from where they had been before.

Losing Ezra...

No. We will find Ezra. We have to, Kanan thought desperately as he hurried back to the elevator.

We just have to.

***