Mark Tuan, You are mine! (GOT7 || Book 2)

08 : Changes

I exhaled, trying to breath the heavy feeling inside of me out. I knew that I was overreacting. I knew that I was hurting myself voluntarily. I knew that I didn't have to care about it. But if I didn't, would I still be in love with Mark oppa?

The statement itself was pretty contradictory. How I can be in love with someone if I didn't care? I don't want to care, but it just doesn't work this way.

I wasn't that girl. That girl that doesn't give a shit and has faith that her boyfriend will only have eyes on her no matter what. No, for me, between trust and distrust is a really thin border. I wanted to trust Mark oppa, I wanted to trust myself, but the bets seemed to be weighing more on the distrust side. I was a really insecure person.

I stood up and rubbed my swollen eyes. Well, whatever. I am going to have my fun today. I kicked the pebble in front of me.

I am a person of rash decisions. I do things before I think. Making me a little silly. But I had a rough day today and it doesn't hurt to be a little crazy sometimes. I forced a small smile on face before giving myself a little cheer.

Mark oppa is not going to affect you so much Min Ae. He is not your everything.

Yet somehow he is...

I shook my head. Nope. He isn't.

I took out my phone and turned it off. I refused to be contacted today. I pulled on my hoodie before starting the party.

I took the bus to the city area. It has been so long since I had been let out the cage. And the first thing I did was to rummaged through the supermarket. I was a big eater. A big and sad eater apparently. I scanned through the rack and rummaged all the cravings that I had been holding in. These few months I had gone by the oppas' preference of junk food and not mine, I haven't satisfied the monster in me for a while.

I threw all the chocolate, the chips, the drinks---everything that I had been dreaming for into the cart and went to the cashier, cashing out with the company's card. I had forgotten my wallet. But still, I guess I will just deal with the consequences later.

"Wow. That's a heap of stuff you got there. Having a party later?" The cashier asked and smiled at me. I merely just nodded before grabbing the bags out.

While walking through the streets, I opened a packet of chocolate and bit into it.

"Massisoyo (Delicious)." I smiled to myself as I bit deeper into the packet of chocolate. I looked around the surroundings, the people smiling, couples looking so happy and families being so blissful. I felt a pang into my chest. I suddenly missed Mark oppa. I missed his warm gestures, his smiles, his teasing, his broad chest and his love.

I missed being loved and cared by him. I missed being the centre of his attention.

I sniffled the choking feeling that is coming through my throat. I looked up and blinked the tears that were coming.

Plop. Plop. Plop.

I suddenly felt drops of water on my cheeks.I let out a heavy sigh and an annoyed grunt. Damn the stupid weather.

The drops of rain that were dropping from the sky became bigger and bigger. I sighed as I put a hand onto my head to cover my face and ran to find the nearest shelter. As I spotted the nearest shopping mall, I quickly dashed across the street the get there.

When I finally got into the safety of the mall, I looked down at myself and cursed under my breath. I was freaking soaked in rain. And I didn't bring a bag!!!

I ran my hand through my hair as I used the sleeves of my sweater to wipe off the raindrops on my face. Yeah. I know that it is pretty dirty but whatever. I just don't care anymore.