Second Chance (editing)

I'm Only Me When I'm With You

Just a small town boy and girl living in a crazy world, trying to figure out what is and isn't true. And I don't try to hide my tears, my secrets, or my deepest fears. Through it all, nobody gets me like you do. And you know everything about me. You say that you can't live without me. I'm only up when you're not down. Don't want to fly if you're still on the ground. It's like no matter what I do, well, you drive me crazy half the time; the other half I'm only trying to let you know that what I feel is true. And I'm only me when I'm with you.

The warm September breeze breaks through my hair as I walk up the driveway with my hands in my pockets. After waiting for weeks on end, the time has finally come for me to propose. Everything is in place; I'm ready for the night to begin. All I told Bella is that we're going on a bit of a road trip. I know how much she loves those. My hand shakes as I ring the doorbell and, all of a sudden, the warm breeze turns to an icy wind. I'm so nervous. My nerves are consuming me. I've been planning this and waiting for this for so long, and I just don't want anything to go wrong. I want her to say yes, but there's a tiny part of me that's worried that she'll say no. Bella opens the door with a smile on her face.

            "Hey, babe!"

She steps forward and kisses my cheek.

            "Hey, sweetie."

I take her hand, hoping that it will stop mine from shaking.

            "Are you ready to go?"

            "Yeah. I don't think I really need much, do I?"

            "No you don't. Just your beautiful self."

Mason appears in the doorway.

            "You two have fun."

When Bella has her back turned to him, he winks and gives me a thumbs up.

            "We will."

Bella says, closing the door behind her. As we walk to the car, I keep my hand in hers.

            "Hey, are you okay? Your hand is shaking and your grip is really tight."

            "Yeah, I'm fine. I guess I'm just a little nervous that we might be driving in the rain. I still remember that one time we got caught in a storm when I was driving you home."

I hate lying to her but, given the circumstances, I can't tell the truth.

            "Oh, yeah! That was pretty scary. But, hey, it lead to us going to the Joe Tyler concert together," She reminds me. In a softer voice, she adds, "The night we danced."

            "That was a good night."

I give her hand one last squeeze before letting go and opening the passenger door for her. My hand is still shaking a little when I get in the car, but I hold tight to the steering wheel in an attempt to calm my nerves. I try to act natural by making jokes. Bella laughs even when I know they aren't really that funny. I love her for that. When I run out of jokes, I start making small talk. This drive will give us plenty of time to talk about things that we haven't had much time to talk about lately.

            "So, tell me about your job. How has it been writing your own column?"

            "Oh, it's wonderful! It's really a great outlet for my thoughts."

            "What kind of things do you write about?"

I don't recall her ever going into detail about the promotion.