Seventeen

11

Michael fidgets for a solid five minutes before addressing Calum.

"Just," he trails off and scratches a hand through his hair roughly. "Just don't let me out of here, okay?"

"Okay," Calum agrees easily enough. He doesn't ask questions, and Michael likes that about him, but he also feels like he should give Calum an explanation.

"I don't know what I'm going to do, physically," Michael admits, looking down at his hands tangled in his lap again. "I, um- I'm going inside my head to talk to all the personalities. To try to reason with them, you know? I might pass out, I might jump out the window. It's a horse a piece, really."

Calum nods at that, albeit apprehensively. "Have you done this before?"

"When I was younger," Michael shrugs. "I used to do it all the time, because-" he cuts off and let's out a humorless laugh, rubbing a hand down his face. His palms are sweaty and gross against his skin, but he rubs at his eyes, anyway. "They were the only people I could talk to. My only friends."

Calum doesn't respond. He pads over to the door in his blue socks and flicks the deadbolt lock on the door. "Luke took Ashton somewhere. You're free to go into your mind."

Michael's mouth twitches as he fights back a smile at how well Calum knows this. He takes precautions, and Michael likes that about him, likes that Calum thinks ahead, even when he doesn't. He likes that Calum puts Ashton's safety high on his priority list, too.

"Thank you," Michael says quietly as he lays back on the couch. He settles into the cushions, legs pressed together and arms at his side, and closes his eyes. The large windows across the fourth wall of the studio have been covered with thick sheets, so it's almost completely dark to Michael's eyes, except for the overhead light (that's really more for Calum sake than his own).

It takes a few seconds to focus enough and to visualize the scene, but eventually, the quiet noise of the city below fades out and what little light he could see disappears, and Michael's left in the dark, senseless and struggling to breathe in what feels like the crushing atmosphere. It feels like everything is pushing down on his body, like he's squeezing through the cracks in his own brain.

He blinks twice and the white room he'd spent half his childhood in appears. There's a large circle table in it, with five chairs around it, evenly spaced like Twenty prefers. The four personalities are already seated, in order of age, staring at Michael with various expressions. Nine is scowling, Seventeen looks bored, Twenty is angry, and Twenty Five is disappointed.

Michael sighs at them and pulls out the remaining chair to sit down.

He always thought it would be strange to see himself multiplied, but it isn't. They don't look like him, not exactly. They look how they want to look in here. Nine is small, average height for a nine year old, with choppy blonde hair and big green eyes. Seventeen's hair is longer and blue, and her eyelashes are always thick and long. She has better eyebrows that Michael, too, and is dressed in a sleeveless pink crop top and high waisted black pants. Michael notes that her navel is pierced today and starts to wonder why.

Twenty is always clean and crisp. Today, their blond hair is slicked back, and they're wearing a comfy black sweater and jeans, both of which are clean of any dirt or dust particle. Twenty Five- Raven, Michael thinks he likes to be called- has short black hair and is wearing a fucking Polo top that has Seventeen rolling her eyes. The black hair helps Michael understand why he wants to be called Raven. He wonders if the rest of them have preferred names.

"Uh, hey," Michael says finally. "What's up?"

"Cut the chit chat, bitch," Seventeen waves her hand dismissively. She's lounging comfortably in her chair, with one arm thrown round the back and one foot propped up on the edge of Nine's chair. "We know why you're here- you want to know if we like Ashton." Twenty makes a grunting noise that has Seventeen shushing them. "I don't mind the kid. His face is beautiful, he has great structure."