[As soon as she had disappeared into her bedroom, The Doctor hurried back to the TARDIS (which was parked in the living room) and retrieved the dinner he’d had the Ponds help him make.]
As they neared the end of their dinner (which River had declared delicious, albeit suspiciously), The Doctor prepared himself to ask about the nightmares.
“River,” he started carefully, “you know I care about you and I’ll be there when you need me, right?”
“Of course I do, Sweetie. What brought this on?” she asked, looking at him with concern.
“And you know I worry about you.” This time it wasn’t a question. “Do you trust me?” He remembered with sudden clarity the first time he had met her, in The Library. Oh, how she had trusted him then.
“Yes.” She thought for a moment that she had seen the briefest flash of pain in his kind eyes, but it was gone so quickly that she wondered if she had imagined it.
“Will you let me help with your nightmares?” River hesitated, unsure of what that would entail and afraid of what he might find in her dreams. “Please, River. I cannot stand to see you suffer.”
“Yes,” she repeated a moment later. There was no doubting his sincerity, and seeing him plead with her was more than she could bear.
“Thank you,” he told her earnestly, aware of how much she was trusting him with. “All right, we’ll start after dinner, then. We’re going to need time, somewhere comfortable and safe where we won’t be interrupted by anything, and because of the connection we’re going to forge, I think it’s best to do this in the TARDIS. Her telepathic field will amplify the connection, which’ll be helpful for our first go.”
“Connection? Telepathic field? First go? As in, we’re going to be doing this again?” River questioned.
“Er, yes. Time Lords have the ability to connect on a mental and emotional level, although it isn’t something one shares with anyone. It’s highly personal, and not always used the way we’re about to. We are going to use it to allow me to enter the part of your mind that’s supplying the nightmares -- most likely, it’ll be memories, trauma, and whatever is left over from the people who...trained you.
“As for the telepathic field, d’you remember when the TARDIS showed you how to fly her in Berlin? The TARDIS gets in your head when you board her, and well, she recognized you. She exists throughout all of space and time -- she knows all that has ever happened or ever will. The moment you walked through her doors, she understood who you were and who you would become. She trusted you. She showed you how to save you parents, who she’s also quite fond of, although for some reason she thinks Rory is the pretty one,” The Doctor explained, smiling a bit at the end. He remained quiet while River worked though what she had just learned.
“All right,” she nodded several minutes later. “What about the third question?” The Doctor mentally rewound their conversation, and surprised River by blushing when he remembered.
“Ah,” he started awkwardly. “That. Yes, well, like I said, this connection is used for more than working through nightmares. It’s, ah, a profoundly intimate element traditionally incorporated into other Time Lord...traditions.” The Doctor sighed, knowing that was a rubbish answer. He was walking a very fine line between wanting to be honest with River so that she would trust him, and not giving away too much foreknowledge. Older, married-to-him River probably wouldn’t be overly thrilled about him telling anyone -- even her young self -- about their sex life. Thankfully, River was a very clever woman and was able to make sense of his confused rambling, and understanding settled in the lines of her face.
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She's Only Just Beginning
Fanfiction"Beginnings are infamously tricky, and ours tend to be especially difficult. I just want to keep yours from being more so than it already has been," The Doctor said truthfully. "So is that why you're here, then? Checking up on my beginning two years...
