Never Been Changed

1

There aren't words for pain.

I screamed. The pain increased and increased. "You are going to survive. Breathe, Bella." Edward whispered in my ears. I could feel something pinning me to death. I promised. I promised that I will keep my heart beating. "Breathe, Bella!" Jacob yelled at me.

It hurts. I thought. I wanted to scream out loud. I could feel myself sinking in darkness. I knew what is this. Death. I'm dying. I am going to die. I will never see the soul I'm dying for. Hot tears in my eyes that have been bottled up inside went out. My tears spilled over. Blood. Blood tears.

The worst part came. I screamed loud as I can. "Hush. You are going to be okay." Jacob promised. I opened my mouth to reply but I could not speak. Pain stuck in my throat. I tried to shallow but I cant .

Once again, I vomited ounces of blood. "Is that Carlisle?" Edward panicked. A second later, I heard door creak. Carlisle must be here. My heart beat slowly. I fell in thick of darkness.

....

I was awake hours after with a thought. Oh... I am dead. My head is floating. All I see is blackness . The pain is nowhere, although my head aches a little. So did my stomach. I also felt another difference. Not pain. Something strange feeling.

I feel empty, I thought.

Then suddenly I snapped out of it. Oh God. I gasped. I clinched the tip of blanket. I held it tightly. Where is the baby? My head screamed. I panicked. A horrible thought appeared in my head. What if he or she dies? What if I'm hurting and dying for baby?

But I assured myself. Maybe the baby is alive and maybe I am dead. This is better. I feel the blood rushing under my veins. I am not dead. I am alive. I tried to blink. It works. I blinked. Again. Blink. Blink. Blink.

I could see clearly now. First think I saw is Edward. Holding a baby. My baby. I realized it is girl. Renesmee. My baby. Edward is talking to Carlisle. He didn't even realized I am awake. I decided to say something. So I whispered in a soft voice.

"Renesmee,"