Counting to one

5 2 1
                                    

12:46...47...48...it's two minutes behind from the clock on my phone.
So closer to one in the morning then i should be.
Darkness all around me except for the dull neon green of my alarm clock.
49 or is it 51? 6 hours till I have to be up, but my eyes won't close. I just blink,
12:54.
Three minutes closer.
Quiet save for the steady breath of the house. Shadows cascade upon the walls.
I don't remember when everything grew still. Till it was just the sound of my breathing in my ears.
12:56.
Closer.
Closer to another day. Another hour. Another possible night of activity behind a glass wall.
12:58.
What am I even counting down for? Hopeful I might fall. Let the dim of the room combined with the dim of my mind? Let it swallow me till I float and feel nothing? Just for a while.....
1:00

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