A Future for Sparkhouse

Chapter 10

The blossoming warmth between John and Carol gave both of them a fresh start. Neither had ever known such a peaceful, happy time. Lisa flitted in and out between friends and school and for the first time in her life she actually wanted to invite people back to the house. The bleak chaos they had once lived in had gone, to be replaced with simple order and comfort. John gave both girls a stability and love that was new to them and from which they grew in confidence. In turn the two of them gave him joy and company. After spending most of his time with his grandad, then alone once the old man had passed, he was bowled over by the noise and chatter in his little family. At times he would come back from working on the farm to find a gaggle of girls on the sofa with Lisa, having raided the biscuit barrel and bread bin. He loved the busyness but at times missed the calm quiet of his old little house. At these times he hung in there until bedtime when he knew he would be on his own with Carol. She had opened up to him in the bedroom in a way that neither would ever have believed possible and their loving gave them both strength.

Of course strength wasn't all it gave them and before long Carol started to feel rough, waves of nausea washing over her in the mornings as she tried to get out of bed. At first she ignored the symptoms but John knew her well. One morning when Lisa was at school and he was home alone with Carol he grabbed his opportunity.

"How long is it, Carol? Since your last period?" Used to observing the cycles of his animals and discussing them with vets and farm hands, this subject held no embarrassment for John.

"I...I... I don't know!" spluttered Carol. "I can't remember. Must have been a couple of weeks." She stared out of the window trying to find a date. "I know... it were the day we went to market and got them new bottles for lambs."

John looked at the calendar hanging on the kitchen wall, the one with funny pictures of cats in hats. "Love, that was two months ago! Haven't you had anything in all that time?"

Carol shook her head. When they were first married she had made sure John used a condom. At that time she was desperate not to fall pregnant again. Then they had their hiatus where all thoughts of contraception went out of the window. Funnily enough neither party thought about it once they had started to sleep together again. The pleasure and fun of exploring each other was their only focus.

Still the idea of actually being pregnant came as a shock to Carol. "I can't be..." she muttered. "I...I...I'm not ready!" She caught John's eye and saw such hope and happiness that her panic began to subside.

"I'm not sure anyone ever is really ready for a baby, Carol. But I guess that's why human pregnancies last so long - just to give you time to come round to the idea!" He smiled warmly at his wife. Part of him was nervous too. He'd had no experience of babies and didn't know what to expect but he loved Carol and felt a strange mixture of relief and joy that she might be carrying his child.

"I'll pop into town this afternoon. I can get one of them tests and we can give it a go before Lisa gets home from school. Best keep it quiet from her for now or she will be so excited she will want to stay home till she knows for sure!"

Carol gave a weak laugh. John took her hand. "I know it's scary for you, love," he said to her, "But it will be different this time. I promise you that. You'll have me with you. And Lisa will go mad. She'll be convinced it were her idea and go on about it for weeks!"

This made Carol smile. Maybe it would be ok. Without her dad, without the shame and secrecy this time it really would be different. She nodded her head. "Go on then. Crack on John or you won't get it all done before chemist shuts!" He gave Carol a hug. "Bloody slave driver!" he said, laughing before he pulled on his overalls and got to work. Yes this time would be different and he'd make sure of it

Early afternoon John returned from town with a small paper bag under his arm. Carol was sitting at the kitchen table waiting. "Here it is then, love." and passed it to her with a shy smile.

Carol gripped the packet, hardly daring to move. "What do I do with it then?" she asked. "I didn't have one last time. By the time I thought about being pregnant it were bloody obvious and doctor did it all."

"Well I read the back and you just have to kind of pee on it." John took the bag back from her and dropped its content on the table. He picked up the box and carefully opened it as if it was a precious gift at Christmas. Finally he pulled out the little plastic stick. Both of them stared at it for a moment. "Go on then love. I'll wait here."

Carol stared at him. "On me own?"

"Well I can hardly come in t'loo with ya can I?" He smiled. "Look, it's ok. Whatever the stick says is ok."

She stood gingerly and went to the little bathroom by the back door. After what felt to John like hours as he sat waiting at the table, barely able to breathe, Carol emerged holding the stick.

"Well love, what does it say?" John's calm voice hid his battering heart.

"I don't know. I daren't look!"

"Give it here then." He reached his hand out to her and she blindly held the stick out to him. There was a moment's silence and then his face broke into a huge grin. "Positive. It's positive." He looked up at Carol, his face full of happiness. Her initial shot of fear melted as she saw his reaction. "Well bloody hell! Who'd have thought it?" she replied with a small smile. He stepped closer go her and pulled her to him in a warm hug. "You know what, Carol? We shouldn't really be surprised. We've been at it like rabbits for the last couple of months and we both know how nature works!" she swatted him playfully and in that moment they both knew it was going to be fine.

"When are we going to tell Lisa then?" Carol asked.

"Best be sooner rather than later, I guess," John replied, "cos I will be rubbish at keeping this secret!"

Carol nodded happily. "Can we just keep it to ourselves for a couple of days though? " she asked. "I just want some time to get used to the idea between me and you."

"Of course, love. We can think about telling her in a few days when you're ready. Best make an appointment at surgery with that new doctor though. See what he says."

A few days later, after booking in with the midwife at the surgery and having some time to get used to the idea, Carol was finally ready to tell Lisa their news. Predictably she was over the moon and announced it had been her idea all along. The date was booked for a first scan and the midwife visited to fill out the forms and check on Carol. John's joy at seeing his child on the scan was infectious and brushed away any last doubt in Carol's mind. For each member of this growing family the future was finally filled with hope.