Alzheimer's Disease, my dad's story

Stage 5 - Moderately severe cognitive decline

(Moderate or mid-stage Alzheimer's disease)
Gaps in memory and thinking are noticeable, and individuals begin to need help with day-to-day activities. At this stage, those with Alzheimer's may:

Be unable to recall their own address or telephone number or the high school or college from which they graduated Become confused about where they are or what day it is Have trouble with less challenging mental arithmetic; such as counting backward from 40 by subtracting 4s or from 20 by 2s Need help choosing proper clothing for the season or the occasion Still remember significant details about themselves and their family Still require no assistance with eating or usingthe toilet."

During the latter part of 2005 my dad got lost for the first time that I know of. He was walking around their block to visit an old friend who lived behind them. As he walked down the street he must have forgotten where he was going because he walked up and down the street where his friend lived without finding and entering his house. Luckily another friend of mine who is a stay at home mum lived on the same street and saw him. Careful not to upset him, she approached him and asked where he was going. He said that he was looking for his friend's house but could not remember which one it was since they recently painted it another colour. My friend said that she doesn't think his friends were at home and offered to walk him back to his house. Once she returned home she phoned me to tell me what happened. My mum later told me that my dad was out for almost 2 hours.

A few months later he tried to walk to the shops and was found by the police at the edge of town where he had fallen down. He had a cut on his forehead and bruises all over. The police thought that he might have been attacked since he had neither shopping nor money with him when he was found. He couldn't remember his address but living in a small town, one of the officers knew our family and could bring him home. My dad couldn't remember being attacked and said he was felt dizzy and then he fell.

After this incident it became more difficult for my mum to keep dad at home. He accused her of trying to be his jailer and of treating him like a child. My pacifist father became aggressive and swore at my mum. Because she was not very mobile after her stroke she couldn't physically prevent him from leaving the property and he managed to sneak away a few times. Luckily, with the kindness of their friends and neighbours, there was always someone to bring him back home.

His illness was taking a toll on not only him, but on my mum as well. She started to go into denial about his condition and scolded him when he forgot things. Frustrated and angry about his limitations, she lost her temper often. Since she had difficulty speaking and he had difficulty hearing, it took her a long time to explain to him what she needed and it took him only a few seconds to forget what she explained. Sometimes within minutes after a meal, my dad would ask her when they were going to have their meal. When she told him that they had just eaten, he would get angry and accuse her of trying to starve him to death. Life with dad was not a Sunday School Picnic. My mum often phoned me at work telling me to come immediately. Then she would put the phone down and not answer it again. I had to take time off work and rush to their home. She would be in tears and dad would be walking up and down looking tense and saying that there was something wrong with mum. Usually it was just her frustration getting the better of her and a talk and a cup of coffee saved the day.