Problem 05

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Fifth problem: I don't deserve to live.

I can't take this anymore. When I look back at my past, I just could see darkness. There is nothing I can see. When I see my left side, there is no one that accept me to live. I just another 'thing' for all of them. When I see my right side, I just couldn't see any harmonise beside my parents. I hate their problem. For the correction; I hate my life. Everything about my life.

I can't have my own love. I don't even deserve to love anybody or receive any love from anybody. Everyone.

I can't have my own best friend, even if it's just one person in my whole life. I hate it. I don't have someone to be shared with. I can't even smile anymore.

I even can't see any light in my life. All that I can see is just darkness and always be total darkness.

I took my Cellphone and start to see my reflection through the camera.

What the... What? You are going to take a selfie?! ask Emily roughly.

"Duh. You were so annoying, Emily."

Then I took my favourite 'thing' in this world. Drug.

"Ok! Stop it!"

They were finally stopped after I yell, "Please, you both!"

"Hey, I have never seen you use a drug. Is that your new concept?" ask Sasha.

"Uh-huh," is all I can answer for now.

"I hope you die," said Emily.

I stared blankly to my left side.
"Um, just kidding."

Sasha yells to me to stop the drug. I can't.

I have to feel myself firstly before seen my God.

"You were planning to die!" yells Sasha like her hundreds of time yelled.

Without asking any more to them, my closest friends, I took a Knife inside my purse and going to stab it around my head.

"Feel the sensation first," said Emily such like a Commentator. The professional one.

And I can't hear Sasha's sound anymore.

I know. They were just my imagination all the time. But I love them.

And with my last smile, I stab the Knife like the plan and feeling the most pleasurable feel I've ever felt.

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Hellooo? The phsycopat ending. Hum.
Hohoh.

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