"anxiety, self-esteem,.... low self esteem."
Yes, today had been one of those days were I felt, I don't know? Exposed... Like everyone could see right through me. See all my imperfections, my flaws.
& yes, I am aware that it's most definitely not healthy to think that way but, I can't help it.
It's the way I am.... I guess.
I even tried putting on mascara and just a little bit of lip stick but, I didn't look pretty. I didn't feel pretty.
And it's not just feeling pretty or being pretty. I didn't feel comfortable anymore. And it's been happening a lot recently lately. Sometimes I feel like I'm trying to hard and that everyone knows it. When infant no one knows, because no one really pays me any mind. Not that I do mind.
No one knows of the conflict in my head.
Sometimes I could be in a room and I'd listen to all the voices around me and suddenly I feel like they get louder and louder and louder. Like they're shouting at me.
Sometimes I feel like its all too much. But what's too much? I dont know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know what my deal is & I don't know what my problem is.
Sometimes that caused me to become irritated and I just close everyone off, cold. I don't mean to it's just the way it is & it's very hard to explain.
-Kira
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This one was a long one & a very serious one. Usually they all are but this one was most especially. Um, ... I don't know what else to say really.
I guess this has become part of the entries so here's today's question : does anyone have anxiety? If so, how do you know you have it? How do you deal with it?
YOU ARE READING
Things I Wanted To Say But Never Did
RandomThings I Wanted To Say But Never Did is a book in which I write my thoughts in response to quotes. I write about some of my deep feelings. So this is sort of like a journal/diary, except I'm sharing it with you all. I feel a lot of you can relate...
