(A/N) @Angelfish456requested KurCro. I made it pitch, hope you don't mind ;-; enjoy and remember to drop a request my way!
~~
-- tyrannicalClown [TC] began trolling casanovaAquarium [CA] --
TC: SO I SEE THAT A MOTHERFUCKER'S BEEN ALL UP AN HITTIN ON MY PALEST A LOVES
TC: AND I ALSO SEE THAT MY PALEST A LOVES AIN'T FEELIN TOO COMFY COZY WITH THE IDEA OF A SHITTY AS SEA DWELLER FLIRTIN WITH HIM
CA: vwoah vwoah
CA: hold your horses there ya crazy clovwn.
CA: first of all
CA: i ain't flirting with tuna
CA: vwhy the FUCK vwould i flirt vwith him.
CA: the brain-dead scum sucker probs just confused basic manners and kindness vwith flirtin
CA: besides hes got tula
CA: not ewven I vwould flirt with someone if I knevw they vwere dating someone else.
TC: DON'T YOU TRY TO PLAY INNOCENT YOU VILE PIECE OF TRASH.
TC: WE BOTH KNOW FULLY WELL THAT YOU WOULD AND HAVE FLIRTED WITH A MOTHERFUCKER WHILE KNOWING FULLY WELL THAT THEY'RE CURRENTLY TAKING UP THE QUADRANT OF SOMEONE ELSE.
CA: avw crap. this shit again? really kurolz?
CA: I vwoulda figured by now that you'd be owver it!!
TC: I AIN'T NEVER GONNA GET OVER THAT SHIT YOU FISHY BITCH.
CA: IT VWAS PERIGEES AGO!!!
CA: fuck man
CA: I already told you I DIDN'T KNOVW MEULIN VWAS VWITH YOU!
CA: but really can ya blame me Chief?
CA: meu's got a pretty face on her
CA: shame she's deaf.
TC: WATCH IT.
TC: YOU'RE ALREADY IN ENOUGH TROUBLE WITH ME ABOUT TUNABRO, DO YOU WANNA WORSEN YOUR PUNISHMENT?
CA: punishment?
CA: kinky
CA: and vwho knovws, maybe the 'punishment' ya got in mind vwill be fun in my eyes
CA: if ya catch my drift ;)
TC: YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.
TC: I PRAY TO THE MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS THAT ONE DAY YOU'LL MEET THE HORRIBLE, PAINFUL END YOU DESERVE.
CA: instead a praying to your clovwn gods for useless shut like that vwhy don't ya pray for your 'rail vwho ain't right in the head and beliewves that basic manners are flirting.
TC: YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH ABOUT MITUNA OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL SHUT IT FOR YOU.
CA: pfffft yeah okay
CA: vwhatcha gonna do chief?
CA: ya gonna stitch my mouth shut too?
TC: CRONUS YOU ARE BEING EVEN MORE INSUFFERABLE THAN USUAL.
TC: DID KANKRI REJECT YOUR SEXUAL NEEDS LAST NIGHT AGAIN?
CA: okay fuck you man
CA: you can hawve yourself a good ol chuckle bout anything else but Kanny? No. Off limits.
TC: LOOKS LIKE I STRUCK A NERVE.
TC: NOW YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO HAVE YOUR QUADRANTS ATTACKED.
CA: KANNY AND I AIN'T IN A QUADRANT TOGETHER.
TC: WHAT HAPPENED? DID HE BREAK UP WITH YOU?
CA: you and I BOTH knovw that he's a celibate. no quadrants at all. so no. he didn't "break up" with me because he and i technically were newver datin'.
CA: sadly
TC: DOESN'T SEEM THAT WAY TO THE REST OF US.
TC: WE AIN'T DUMB YOU SCUMBAG.
TC: WE AIN'T BLIND.
TC: NEITHER IS PORRIM.
TC: WE SEE THE SHIT THAT'S GOING ON BETWEEN YOU TWO.
TC: ALL I GOTTA SAY IS THAT YOU BETTER WATCH YOURSELF OR ELSE YOU AND THAT MUTANT BLOODED FILTH WILL FACE THE RAGE OF A CERTAIN RAINBOW DRINKER.
CA: is that a fuckin' threat?
CA: are ya actually threatenin me?
CA: or no, excuse me, are you TRYIN to threaten me.
CA: because if ya are, it's vweak.
CA: honestly i'm disappointed kurloz, i expected better threats than that
CA: you honestly beliewve that i'm gonna be scared a porrim?
CA: oh no, porrim found out that i'm good friends vwith kankri and that i'wve been spendin time vwith him!!
CA: vwhat's happened to you
CA: i used to enjoy our pitch banter but lately you'wve just been gettin vweaker and vweaker at it.
CA: and yet ya vwonder vwhy i'wve taken a liking to mituna
CA: his pitch banter is better than yours. alvways has been and alvways vwill be.
CA: sorry kur, maybe ya just vweren't meant to have a kismeisis.
TC: LISTEN UP YOU SEA DWELLING SLUT, YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY PALE MATE OR SO HELP ME YOU BETTER START PRAYING CAUSE I WILL KICK YOUR ASS.
TC: I DON'T CARE IF WE NEED YOU TO BEAT THE GAME I WILL OFFER YOUR BEATEN BODY TO THE MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS.
CA: hovw cute, you're trying to make it up to me
CA: ya alvways knevw i liked it rough ;)
TC: SHUT THE FUCK UP CRONUS.
TC: YOU KNOW WHERE TO MEET ME, YOU KNOW WHAT TIME I EXPECT YOU TO BE THERE. IF YOU AREN'T THERE ON TIME I WILL INFORM YOUR MUTANT BLOODED "FRIEND" OF SOME TRIGGERING THINGS YOU'VE SAID.
CA: damn, novw THAT'S some pitch flirtin
CA: but don't vworry
CA: i vwouldn't dare be late ;)
-- casanovaAquarium [CA] ceased trolling tyrannicalClown [TC] --
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The Big Book of Oneshots
FanfictionJust a book filled with whatever oneshot I can muster. I do accept requests, either comment here of PM me whatever ship you want me to write about and I'll do it!
